Soo mentally exhausted tonight

[Briar_Rose]

But I can't sleep so I'm Dibbing!!

I swear Zach has taken about 3 steps back lately!!! He seems to be getting lunchtime detentions every day - he had to do 2 today which meant he had about 5 minutes to get and eat his lunch!!! The school don't seem to be making any allowances at all for his behvaiour, which seems to be exacerbating the problems and then when he gets in he is so aggresive towards me and Danny!!

Tonight it was almost non-stop screaming as I made him turn off the tv and computer s=and sit down and clear his backlog of homework - he keeps insisiting it doesn't have to be done - when I know full well it does - and thenhe forgets it - so get s another detention.

I feel so bad making him do it sometimes as I almost have to stand over him making him write everything down word by word - it really is that tortuous!!

But back to today... I had Danny in the kitchen with me - I printed off some Disney stuff for him to colourr whilst I got on with T and Zach in the living room at the desk. Course Danny likes to hum and sing, talk to me etc - we can't just sit there in silence. So every minute Zach is screaming at Danny toi Shut UP!!!! And I'm telling him to calm down, whilst Danny is trying to be quiet - but it's not fair on him

I'm going on and on and I just want to cry!!!

Zach has a brand new Tv/Dvd player still in it's box downstair as his has broken - I've told him that until we get some good behaviour - he's not getting it - I think it'll be there forever at this rate!!! Or I'm going to set it up in the kitchen!


Last straw - Danny's dad rang up to cancel his weekend again:mad2: I was soo looking forward to this weekend as Zach's away on respite as well, so COl and I were going to have some Grown up time to ourselves!!!! Going out for a meal and kid free shopping - and now that's gone!!!!

Sniffle

[coxan56]

Hi Elize You certainly have your hands full at the minute, no advice I Can give you but you certainly have my sympathy. Can you get support off a welfare officer, regarding all the school detentions

I think the school is failing Zach in the way they are reacting to him with all these detentons, and he his very frustrated with himself at he minute. I hope Col understands your problems and gives you great support epecially when your weekend has now been spoilt.

Are you getting all the support that is available to yourself and Zach.

I hope things settle for you in the next few days and you get to go out and relax Annie

[KittyKat]

Elise

The behaviour of your son describes my DS to a T. He's in Yr9 at school and last half term I think he was going for the record on lunchtime detentions. He frequently 'forgets' about homework and getting him to do that which he does admit to is like getting blood out of a stone. I've also had to stand over him and he can make a 20min task drag on for 2 hours. When he sets his mind to it however he can produce some excellent work which is well above the standard for his age.

However, my DS does not have any diagnosed condition. What I am trying to say is that some of this may be nothing to do with Zach's condition just him being a 'boy'. I know exactly what you mean about going backwards and towards the end of last year the teachers did report some improvements in his behaviour and generally thought that Alex was maturing (at last) but as I said last half term was as bad as he's ever been.

Anyhow I can empathise and I know how awful you can feel after an evening like you have described. I hope things improve soon for you.

Best wishes

Kitty

[janny]

Oh God Elise! I must check tonight if its a full moon!
Over the last few weeks ive had the same problem with Vicki...... she seems to be going backwards instead of forwards!
Since coming back from our hols in September she has had 15 "lates", which has meant 2 after school detentions, her mood is absolutely foul and the screaming at the top of her lungs (for relatively minor things) is driving me up the wall!! :(

Just a thought..... as they are both "at it", i dont suppose it could be anything to do with the dark nights, clocks going back, lack of sunlight.....could it?
Any thoughts from other ADHD mums and dads would be appreciated!
The thing is, we can go 7 weeks in the summer holidays with no meds and no "incidents", but we are fully "meded" at the moment and things are BAD!

[Sean_and_Sue]

I posted here a week or so back, about the deterioration in my DS's behaviour - he has only just started secondary, and so far the novelty of the work he has to do is keeping him on track there - but in terms of his behaviour at home - the screaming at his younger sister, (it seems she only has to breathe a little too loudly), and with things like keeping his room tidy, putting stuff away - non stop shouting/nagging from me, and foul mood in response, and a big jump in aggressive behaviour from him.

I am struggling myself, so I haven't got any words of advice - just some {{{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}} - had a few evenings like that myself lately, so I know how exhausting it is:(

Love Suexx

[Briar_Rose]

After posting that I read his Home/School book and surprise he's got another detention for today for trying to unscrew a door handle(or something)
GAAAAAH!!! He just doesn't get it!!!!!

I've written a note in there asking them if I can see the year manager and the SENCO as something has to be done.

All these detentions must be making things worse as he isn't getting a chance to get outside and run around at all now - so when he's had his lunch he's straight into the classroom again with no time to run around and expend some energy - no wonder the poor little s*d is bored and restless!!!! They seem to be wanting to turn him into a feeral child and he is getting so resentful whenhe goes to school now!

When he was at primary school - they'd sometimes put him on litter duty, which entailed going around the grounds with a picker to gather up all the rubbish - wondering if I should suggest that as it's a sort of punishment and at least he'll be stretching his legs!!!

I think that's why he's being so aggressive at home as well cos he can't get rid of his bad stuff at school, so he lets rip at home.

Col is NOT being very understanding this time either. His eldest DS(20) is coming down now so instead of a nice meal for adults I suggested we bring Danny along - he has beautiful manners when we go out without Zach and he loves curry etc. But Col won't have any of it - just stated flatly that he has enough of my kids as it is and he's got past his child rearing stage!!! Needless to say he didn't stay last night!! He has got a point - his kids are growing up but a little tact and consideration would have been nice:cry:

Sometimes I just feel like ringing up Soc. Sevices and screaming at them to do something for me - but he#'s always good whenthey visit and then he's as good as gold when he's away for the weekend in respite - I can't win!!

[Bartswife]

Sending hugs your way. Its very hard, you feel like you are constantly having to be a nag to get things done only for your child to take their frustration out on you. I have to shoulder it all too, added to the fact that my boys shout at each other for the silliest little thing. Tea time is a shouting match daily! Not that it helps your situation but just letting you know you are not alone in feeling drained.

[loadsapixiedust]

Sounds like you need a few {{{hugs}}}.
We've noticed a few of Ben's behavioural problems are creeping back with a vengeance. There must be something in the air. Homework is always a battle with him. I have to say his school sometimes doesn't seem to deal with him very well either which just makes matters worse and of course, it's the Mums who get the backlash of their frustration. You are definately not alone, and it can't be easy if your OH isn't sympathetic, it always helps to have a good moan with other Mums.