Sick with worry!!!!

[sonny1966]

Apologies in advance, this is a long rant but I need some reassurance, pixie dust, (((hugs))) and anything else you good folks might have to spare!!!

We are now only 16 days away from our long awaited trip to Orlando. ( It's 7 years since we last went and I've been saving to go again ever since!!!) It's been booked since August 04 and I've been like an excited child ever since *lol*

However, now we are sooooo close, I am becoming soooo paranoid about every little detail that I feel sick and can't even sleep!!!! Is this normal???? I can't believe that I'm behaving like this, its never happenned before and I thought everything was pretty well organised - attraction tickets and ADR's booked ages ago, parking and insurance sorted, currency ordered - so NO LAST MINUTE PANICS (or so I thought!!)

I've developed an irrational fear that we might not have returned the I 94w (green waiver) forms last time we went - I don't know why, 'cos its not like I've found them at home or anything - I just can't REMEMBER giving them back and I can't get it out of my mind!!! So I rang the USA Embassy and spoke to a very nice lady who said that they couldn't check in advance and that if I was worried, just make sure that I carry bank statements or wage slips with the relevant dates on incase of problems on arrival. I ordered copy statements etc from the bank so that should've put that concern to rest............but NO....... I still couldn't sleep..........so...........I got up in the middle of the night and frantically started searching the net to see if anyone had experienced similar problems and, if so, what had happenned to them..........

Whilst doing this, I found a piece of info on the Embassy website saying that anyone who has been ARRESTED needs a visa........now, I knew that this applied to anyone with a criminal record but what about if you were not even charged?? because this has oppenned up a whole new problem!!!

At New Year, DS 17 got into an argument at a party and was accused of kicking someone's car. The police were called and arrested him and took him in for questioning. He was never charged because the car concerned was so batterred that even the owner couldn't pinpoint what damage he was supposed to have caused and it was just his word against my son's anyway. The policeman who came to tell us that he wasn't being charged even appologised for wasting our time and we just put it behind us until now...but he did have his finger prints taken and I guess he should've applied for a visa!!!!!! So now I'm panicking all over again..........with only 2 weeks to go, its too late to get a visa now and I daren't ring the embassy on this one incase I they ask my name and I just alert them to the fact that he is coming!!!!!!

To add insult to injury, our tickets arrived yesterday and Virgin have not sent accomodation vouchers or transfer vouchers for DS 17. He was added to the booking at a later date because he didn't originally want to come with us and then changed his mind!! So, I've rung them and they're supposed to be sending all his paperwork out seperately but now I'm worrying that it won't arrive in time!!!

At this rate, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown before we even take-off. So please (if anyone has bothered to read to the end of the thread) can you offer me any reassurance - particularly about the visa issue!!!???!!!:confused: :confused2 :cry:

[Scotsmomma]

Take a deep breath.....It'll all work out ok.....I don't see how your son can need a visa when he wasn't charged...lol I do think it's normal to feel like you're feeling though...I tend to stress over every little thing too...I'm sure everything will fall into place...Just keep hassling Virgin if you don't get things sorted in the next few days.....lol and remember...it's all worth it in the end

[Jay66UK]

Don't panic - that's what I do!

The visa thing is a bit of an issue. They are likely to ask you on entry if you have been arrested - that is what the declaration is asking you to confirm. I was very casually asked if I had been arrested whilst the immigration officer processed our forms.

I have no clue what information is shared between UK police and the US immigration, and I have no clue what level of crime is deemed serious enough to be declareable...but the question on the forms and at the desk is "arrested" and not "charged".

As I see it you have 4 choices.

1. Leave son behind (I never said they were sensible or good choices!);
2. Find out how to get him a visa very quickly - there must be an express procedure;
3. Take a chance and tell them on arrival that he has been arrested and take with you as much paperwork as the arresting police force will give you, confirming he was never charged etc.
4. Take a chance, lie/forget about the arrest on arrival and see what happens.

I would be looking strongly at 2 as 3 and 4 both risk denial of entry (and 4 risks longer term, bigger consequences).

I hope it all sorts out for you.

[Tiggernut]

I think you need to take several deep breaths......................

Okay now lets look at the problems one by one...

The Green Waiver forms - 99 times out of 100 these are taken by virgin (or whatever airline) when you check in for the rturn flight - you probably won't even have noticed they took them as they do it so quick. If they aren't in your passports, then they were handed back. It will NOT be a problem!

With regards to your sons 'problem' - I know we're not supposed to comment on this on here but I'm sure that there are plenty of people who have done more than your son who happily walk through each year totally oblivious to the legal aspects. I know this isn't exactly what you want to hear but I think you need to feel reassured before you completely lose it!!!

Ring Virgin again and double check that your son is booked on the flight - if he is they his paperwrok will undoubtably arrive in the next couple of days.

Have you talked this over with the rest of your family? I think you need to do so - they need to know how stressed you are. Why not book yourself a facial or a massage at a local beauty shop - doing something for YOU may help you to relax a bit. If this fails, pop and see your GP as you sound like you really need something to help you to relax.

I'm positive that you will have a problem-free wonderful holiday - BUT you must get yourself sorted out beforehand otherwise things will just get worse!

Take care

[Tiggernut]

I have to say Jay66UK - I have NEVER been asked if I've been arrested. My form, correctly, says no but I have never been asked as well!:confused:

[BCKloon]

With regards to your sons 'problem' - I know we're not supposed to comment on this on here but I'm sure that there are plenty of people who have done more than your son who happily walk through each year totally oblivious to the legal aspects. I know this isn't exactly what you want to hear but I think you need to feel reassured before you completely lose it!!!

That does happen but not recomended for the faint hearted

3. Take a chance and tell them on arrival that he has been arrested and take with you as much paperwork as the arresting police force will give you, confirming he was never charged etc.

Thats what i would do , but personally speaking i think you will be fine.

[DonnaD]

As long as the forms weren't in your passports the checkin staff must have automaticaly taken them. My husband's was left in his passport 2 years ago. When they took it at US immigration 9 months later they said it might cause a problem in future once the paperwork was up to date. This has not happened! We have been back at least twice since and it has never been questioned. Definitly don't worry about this one. They staple them into your passport and you would have noticed next time you used them.

Donna

[Tiggernut]

Originally posted by BCKloon
That does happen but not recomended for the faint hearted


I certainly wasn't recommending it, I can assure you - but I thought the OP was in too much of a state at the moment to hear anything else! :(

[tinkernell]

dont worry about your son IM PRETTY CERTAIN that type of information is not shared. i have heard of people who have visited the states who have been arrested in the past for "real " crimes and have not been refused entry and ive also not heard of anyone who has ever been asked if they have been arrested either...
you sound very much like me and you will worry yourself into a big fuzzy ball. RELAX, you cant change the outcome anyway and if you dont relax you will spoil your holiday
good luck

[mole]

Sonny1966, I am also a bit of a worry guts so try this:

Never say to youself 'don't panic or don't worry' the last words you think of are panic and worry.

Keep saying to yourself 'keep calm and breath'

Personally speaking I think you will be fine

Have a great holiday

[Jay66UK]

Originally posted by tinkernell
...and ive also not heard of anyone who has ever been asked if they have been arrested either...

The guy asked me this time (but didn't ask DW) - very casually, near the end, after joking with DD6 that she was naughty for not being at school. Just trying to forewarn that, if the question is asked you need to make sure your answer corresponds with your waiver answer and not to assume it means they know you have been arrested (as I haven't been!).

Good luck with it, Sonny.

[john7/11]

Don't worry:wink I know that's easier said than done but DON'T. & my wife says get some valium she swears by it every time we fly:D

[sonny1966]

Thanks to everyone for their thoughts - I feel alot calmer just getting it off my chest!!!!

I like the idea of "keep calm and breath" as I always panic if I tell myself DON'T *lol*

[poet123]

I think if you are a worier then you will find something to worry aboyt.....believe me I know!!
We have never been asked at immigration questions relating to arrests etc, in fact the chap this year was very friendly indeed and was interested in where we were staying as he had never visited Marco Island but had heard it was a great place. He chatted with us for several minutes and was really nice, so....
I would not worry about your son, I think the whole sharing of info issue is actually not as detailed as the powers that be would like us to think, and only crimes of moral turpitude are covered.
Take a deep breath and have a great time!!!!!!!

[john7/11]

have a look here -http://www.thedibb.co.uk/web/imigration/xvisaback.jpg & look at the wording. i think it will ease your worries:wink:D

[tinkernell]

i agree with john, i have a copy in front of me right now and unless he has a drug offence or has been sentenced for 5 years or more (thankfully not) then you can stop worrying now..
think holiday, think mickey think all things wonderful
and CHILL
x

[AndyJ]

These rules are not about stoping average people having a holiday, and bringing money into the USA via tourism.

Don't sweat the small stuff!

[trekkie]

I know that this is the last thing that you want to hear but my son was in a similar situation, he was arrested but no charge unfortunately the police officer dealing with the case put all the information on the police national computer so he applied for a visa and he got it, but to be honest the lady who took his paperwork couldn't understand why he was applying for a visa as there was no further action.

I hope you have a great holiday with your son and try not to worry to much

[weeblip]

Definately don't Worry about the green waiver form, all 3 of us still have ours from 2003, and had NO problem whatsoever getting into the USA for our 2004 trip.

I wouldn't worry about the arrest thing either...he wasn't charged so I don't think it counts.

Maxine

[Jay66UK]

The matter of arrest is important, not charge. This annoys me (despite never being arrested) as you could easily be arrested as part of a group suspected of involvement in a serious crime and later be found to have been an innocent bystander.

The most important thing is the "moral turpitude" clause, and it is difficult to pin this down. The best I have found online is
http://www.gapsc.com/ProfessionalPractices/moral_turpitude.pdf which is still ambiguous.

[Bobbins]

The matter of arrest is important, not charge. This annoys me (despite never being arrested) as you could easily be arrested as part of a group suspected of involvement in a serious crime and later be found to have been an innocent bystander.

The most important thing is the "moral turpitude" clause, and it is difficult to pin this down. The best I have found online is
http://www.gapsc.com/ProfessionalPractices/moral_turpitude.pdf which is still ambiguous.
That's an interesting link - I've never seen that before.
Apparently the lack of definition of the term has been challenged in the US courts (during a challenge on entry refusal) but it was still unresolved.

The US would really like *everyone* to have a visa, but in reality few people need one. The biggest problem is probably to stop members of your party blurting out something incriminating during the Immigration interview. I've been to the US loads of times and never been asked if I've been arrested. I've also been a couple of times with my green waiver card still in passport and its never been a problem.

[marlouwrig]

I was subjected to a real grilling at the immigration desk this year. The immigration officer spent ages peering at his computer screen and asked me:

1. Had I ever been arrested either in the US or elsewhere
2. What other aliases did I use when travelling (when I said none - he asked me if I was absolutely sure)

He then left us for about 10 minutes before bringing a more senior officer over to the desk and they both poured over the computer screen for another few minutes before finally letting us through. I have no idea what the problem was but although I am an abolutely innocent angel (well on paper anyway;) ) I spent several uncomfortable minutes searching my conscience and feeling guilty as hell:erm:

Regarding the virgin paperwork we also added DS after the original booking and he was treated as an entirely separate booking and all his paperwork came a few days apart from everyone else. If I remember rightly he had no separate accommodation voucher but his itinerary just said that he was sharing accommodation with us.

[Bobbins]

...with DD6 that she was naughty for not being at school.
Do you think US Immigration Offciers know when UK kids should be at school? I guess this might be a problem for some people.

[mackem]

don't want to add more stress - however

We got stopped at immigration when DH and I showed our passports. The guy at the desk asked all sorts of strange questions to DH but not to me. He then said I could enter but DH would need to wait in a side room for further questioning. I went along with him and after what seemed like hours (only about 5 mins in reality) we had finger prints and eye laser tests then we were told everything was ok and we were free to leave. When we asked what the problem was it turns out DH has the same name as a wanted terrorist and they just needed to check DH wasn't the terrorist!!!

We are now expecting to be stopped every year until this terrorist is caught!!

As for your son, the way I see it is that the police apologised for wasting your time so therefore - no problem and he shouldn't have been arrested in the first place. If this is the case can't you just honestly answer no on the green form and say no if challenged?

Try not to worry - easier said than done but just think positive and be honest, that way you can't trip yourself up and look suspicous.

Just relax and have a great time!

[candyyman]

as your DS was not charged then i would , as the police have done , forget it

by arrested im sure they mean charged

i too worry about everythnig before we go
as my daughter is disabled and only has special lmilk shakes as food and is tube fed --we had it delivered direct to our disney hotel and of course it was there but it did not stop me worrying for weeks before we went that they would forget to deliver it !!!

i know you will be ok once you are in your hotel /villa and thats not too far away now

have a great tiem

steve