My deepest respect for working families

[Tinkerbell]

Agree with all comments.. MH , headteacher hasn’t met with the force that is my daughter...

I posted because I feel there is a lot of negativity about working families and single parents, lots of assumptions to be made.

I just think we should celebrate all that is good about working families and single parents.

[vowels]

I have no idea how single parents manage. I could not do it.

I am a stay at home mum, and I feel I am constantly rushing to keep everything moving along.

That head teacher needs a shot of empathy.

[magickate]

Good on her though!

It's tough sometimes. DH is an NHS paramedic, his shifts are a mixture of days & nights, 12 hours on with a 45min commute. We never know what time he'll actually get home, late unpredicatbale hours we accept are just a part of his work. This means I have to plan as a single parent and if DH does make it somewhere on time it's a bonus. But I'm full time too which is also shift work, some weeks all I feel all I do is juggle & rush around. It's getting easier as the children get older (now 9 & 13) but this also now means they're in different schools and neither are a walkable distance from home. DS school breakfast club also opens at 8 which is useless to us & the cost of after school club when we only actually need it for 45minutes is high.

Part of me would love to be a stay at home mom but I could never give up financial independance so it won't be happening.

[Hopefulholiday]

I have been a working parent for 15 years currently very fortunate to be having a career break, although mine are now 19 & 16! Although I have a very supportive DH he was more career focused and earned more so all the organising fell to me and I found that more stressful than my job most of the time. When my dd started school it was a nightmare as for a term she needed to be picked up at lunchtime. I would never have coped if my parents hadn’t agreed to collect her and keep her until I finished work.

I have a friend who is a single Mum and has studied for an Open University degree, a PGCE and is now a full time teacher whilst bringing up 3 school age children. I have told her on many occasions that she is Superwoman and amazing but I honestly don’t know how she does it.
Thankfully lots of companies are now more flexible with parents but they only give so much and it can be very hard!

[duchy]

Originally Posted by mickey house

I find it very disappointing that the head's attitude was change schools if you don't like it.

I have the upmost respect for single parents raising kids especially when they also work full time.

See more...

It's not just single parents , many couples both tend to work full time nowadays. They too often have to address before/after school care, days off for sick kids and school holiday care . For many families it is no longer a choice .
My son was seven when I split with my husband , as he was a high flying workaholic I too could never rely on him for help with drops, pick ups or care . In all honesty my child care issues were no worse as a working single Mum as they were when we were together .

[duchy]

Originally Posted by vowels

I have no idea how single parents manage. I could not do it.

I am a stay at home mum, and I feel I am constantly rushing to keep everything moving along.

That head teacher needs a shot of empathy.

See more...

Most don't have the luxury of choosing. They do it because there isn't any other option.
I've been both a stay at home and working Mum . Both single and married , you just make time for what is important to you regardless but as a stay at home Mum once my son was at school it was definitely an easy option by comparison to working (but if I'm honest a teensy bit boring). Everything gets done either way , you just need more energy and better time management as a working parent

[Tinkerbell]

Originally Posted by duchy

It's not just single parents , many couples both tend to work full time nowadays. They too often have to address before/after school care, days off for sick kids and school holiday care . For many families it is no longer a choice .
My son was seven when I split with my husband , as he was a high flying workaholic I too could never rely on him for help with drops, pick ups or care . In all honesty my child care issues were no worse as a working single Mum as they were when we were together .

See more...

Absolutely agree

Talking to another grandparent at pick up her daughter and son in law both have the same childcare cover issues. I said that I lived abroad so I couldn’t help, she even as a pensioner works as her pension isn’t sufficient, so she had taken annual leave to help the first few weeks. Family dynamics are so very different now. My daughter is the only breadwinner and received no financial support from father or state...

That’s why I headed my post.. working families...

I’m not sure what the solution is. 70% of families in my daughters location commute for a minimum of 2 hrs each day as you say, on top of that there is school holidays and sick days etc etc

It’s must be very stressful for all concerned

[Mrs dee]

Interesting conversation
It’s hard for sure and I’ll be honest ... I think it’s the world we live in now. The things we want to buy, the cars, the holidays - most families have two working now that I know. We could definitely afford to have me not work at all... but we’d have to forgo the big holidays , drop a car , ( maybe a smaller house if decision to stop work altogether was made years ago )... as it was we decided early on that we would miss out on things and I’d go part time so that I would be here for the kids to take them to school, pick them up and be here for them. I know it’s not possible for everyone but that’s a choice we made and it worked for us. I’m so glad that I was fortunate to be able to make that choice because it’s been so important for me to do the school runs and be there at 3 for pick up and do their homework with them. This has meant running around like an absolute looney all day as I work freelance part time so I’m all over between school hours , get kids then homework, dinner finished I’m back out at night some evenings. I’ve got friends who do the 7.30am drop off and pick up at 6 and I honestly couldn’t do it. It must be so so tough both physically mentally and emotionally but I know it’s a tough call financially. On a note it was important for me to not rely too much on grandparents - they have their own life and are always there and help if I ask but I rarely do. Kids now 10 and 16 and I opened up my own business - still part time and back to the bigger holidays now so win win. I will
However be working till god knows when because I don’t have the good job and the pension security but hey ho. I agree with the title - working families deserve a medal for the juggling and a single parent. Wow my hat goes off to them in a big way

[welshmum]

Thank you Tink!

DH and I are both NHS workers and work different shifts each week including weekends and nights so juggling childcare can prove difficult sometimes.

It is getting slightly easier though now that they are a little bit older.

[Lisa123wm]

I am very fortunate to be able to be a stay at home mom, and totally agree with you.
Some of my friends juggle work and kids and sometimes it’s a real struggle, especially in the school holidays.