Advice for keeping son calm on a nine hour flight

AhoyShipmates · 23 Nov 17, 10:42 AM

Our son has developmental trauma, anxiety and sensory processing difficulties. This shows as violent outbursts and meltdowns when he is dysregulated.

He does love holidays, especially when there’s sun and a pool, and he is mad about Disney and dressing up. We have coped on four-hour flights to Greece and the Canaries by having new apps on a tablet, films downloaded, paper and pens and travel games. But we’re worried about how he will manage on the nine-hour flights to and from Orlando, even with the in flight entertainment. He’ll be seven next year when we fly (direct with Virgin).

Is it worth contacting the airline in advance? Can you recommend particular seats? We’ve paid for extra legroom for the return flight, and have booked seats near the galley, toilets and what is hopefully space on the way out, so he can move about and stretch, but any advice on this and anything else you think would help is most welcome.

amandajane10 · 23 Nov 17, 05:37 PM

We have flown with Virgin and Tc with my 2 boys who have ASD and are 7 and 8 one with sensory issues. We found Virgin entertainment really good better than TC. We took small bags of little toys to give during the flight and sticker books. If you phone special assistance you can book your seats for free, we did this with both airlines and booked special assistance to meet us at MCO who were fab and took us all the way to our hire car. We flew from Manchester and went down the disabled lane for security. We have the very back row on our Next Virgin flight coming home as this is where we sat last time and there is no one at the sides of you and a bit of space to move around. If you have any other questions please ask.

DisneyBride08 · 23 Nov 17, 10:16 PM

We have just returned with our son who is seven and has autism. I was so nervous that he wouldn't get on the plane or have a meltdown and he was amazing. We booked the seats at the back of the plane, a two and a two. We thought it was best to split the kids up and they both had a window seat. He could also get out of his seat and fit in-between the area of his seat and the window. He loved the inflight entertainment. He might have watched sponge bob for nine hours but he loved that he could control the screen by touching it. He even used the headphones which isn't something he would do at home.

I attempted to vlog our trip. I will be uploading our travel days at the weekend.

AhoyShipmates · 26 Nov 17, 09:39 AM

Thank you both for replying and for such good advice and reassurance.

I’ll contact Special Assistance and run my concerns by them and see if we can get some extra help at security. Long queues can be very difficult for our boy. I think the hardest thing for us is enduring the looks and muttering of people who think he’s being ‘naughty’ and we are incompetent/indulgent parents.

DisneyBride08 · 26 Nov 17, 10:17 AM

Originally Posted by AhoyShipmates

I think the hardest thing for us is enduring the looks and muttering of people who think he’s being ‘naughty’ and we are incompetent/indulgent parents.

Totally get this. My son freaked out when the plane landed and he couldn't get off right away. The people around us knew the situation as we had talked to them a little bit. Got a lovely look from a couple passing us from the back of the plane! I didn't say anything back. In a way it makes us not worry about asking for special assistance as much as it used to.

Leanne1977 · 26 Nov 17, 09:18 PM

Originally Posted by AhoyShipmates

Thank you both for replying and for such good advice and reassurance.

I’ll contact Special Assistance and run my concerns by them and see if we can get some extra help at security. Long queues can be very difficult for our boy. I think the hardest thing for us is enduring the looks and muttering of people who think he’s being ‘naughty’ and we are incompetent/indulgent parents.

I totally understand how you feel. I suffer with anxiety anyway but the looks and tuts really do cause me a lot of anxiety with our little man. I find flights incredibly stressful and am getting to the point where I’m having to keep our holidays to under 4 hours because I feel that’s all we can cope with.
We make sure we travel with lots of new bits and bobs, doesn’t have to be expensive things, but just something new to keep his interest for a bit. Then we have the iPad loaded with his favourite programmes. Lots of distraction and making everything interesting(even the most silly things) helps with the distraction. It means we literally don’t get a second to just sit and take a breather but it stops a meltdown most of the time. We have the added stress that our son just has the loudest voice ever! He doesn’t understand he is loud and we really struggle to try and keep a lid on that.
I really just wish other passengers could just spend an hour in our shoes, they wouldn’t be so judgemental.

JK's Mummy · 29 Nov 17, 12:16 PM

We couldn't have asked for anything more from virgin with regards to help with our son with asd. They allocated bulkhead seats, allowed us to take his pushchair on the plane so we had it straight away when we got off and constantly asked if there was anything they could do for us.

We were also concerned about stares and comments from others but we found that 9 hours is a long time for any child and although he behaved better than we thought, there were other children wandering the aisles and being 'disruptive' so I didn't feel as bad when he did it.

AhoyShipmates · 29 Nov 17, 04:14 PM

Thanks everyone for your very welcome posts. I’m going to ring Virgin on the back of your advice and see what they can do.

Wouldn’t it be great if one of the airlines created a sensory room with a trampoline...

I know he’ll love it when we get there so whatever happens on the plane I’ll grit my teeth and think of heat, pool time and breakfast at Cinderella’s Royal Table.

Guest · 29 Nov 17, 04:20 PM

Originally Posted by AhoyShipmates

Thanks everyone for your very welcome posts. I’m going to ring Virgin on the back of your advice and see what they can do.

Wouldn’t it be great if one of the airlines created a sensory room with a trampoline...

I know he’ll love it when we get there so whatever happens on the plane I’ll grit my teeth and think of heat, pool time and breakfast at Cinderella’s Royal Table.

I'm sure if they thought there would be enough people willing to pay the supplement price to their ticket that would make up for the fares lost by having a trampoline in that place rather than seats then they'd be happy to do it!

23 Nov 17, 10:42 AM	#1
	23 Nov 17, 10:42 AM AhoyShipmates Excited about Disney
AhoyShipmates Excited about Disney Join Date: May 17	Advice for keeping son calm on a nine hour flight Our son has developmental trauma, anxiety and sensory processing difficulties. This shows as violent outbursts and meltdowns when he is dysregulated. He does love holidays, especially when there’s sun and a pool, and he is mad about Disney and dressing up. We have coped on four-hour flights to Greece and the Canaries by having new apps on a tablet, films downloaded, paper and pens and travel games. But we’re worried about how he will manage on the nine-hour flights to and from Orlando, even with the in flight entertainment. He’ll be seven next year when we fly (direct with Virgin). Is it worth contacting the airline in advance? Can you recommend particular seats? We’ve paid for extra legroom for the return flight, and have booked seats near the galley, toilets and what is hopefully space on the way out, so he can move about and stretch, but any advice on this and anything else you think would help is most welcome.

26 Nov 17, 09:39 AM	#4
	26 Nov 17, 09:39 AM AhoyShipmates Excited about Disney Thread Starter
AhoyShipmates Thread Starter Excited about Disney Join Date: May 17	Thank you both for replying and for such good advice and reassurance. I’ll contact Special Assistance and run my concerns by them and see if we can get some extra help at security. Long queues can be very difficult for our boy. I think the hardest thing for us is enduring the looks and muttering of people who think he’s being ‘naughty’ and we are incompetent/indulgent parents.

29 Nov 17, 04:14 PM	#8
	29 Nov 17, 04:14 PM AhoyShipmates Excited about Disney Thread Starter
AhoyShipmates Thread Starter Excited about Disney Join Date: May 17	Thanks everyone for your very welcome posts. I’m going to ring Virgin on the back of your advice and see what they can do. Wouldn’t it be great if one of the airlines created a sensory room with a trampoline... I know he’ll love it when we get there so whatever happens on the plane I’ll grit my teeth and think of heat, pool time and breakfast at Cinderella’s Royal Table.