Splitting the bill!

[1972]

I am sure this will result in lots of discussion, but going to ask for your opinion.

Just back from a lovely end of term Thai meal ( I work in a school) for 25 colleagues.

We all had our meal and some people ordered starters, main meals and drinks.
I had a curry, rice and 2 alcoholic drinks, but decided not to have a starter.

At the end of the meal, one half of the table got their bill and paid. Then our end got our bill.

I don't usually mind splitting the bill if most people have had the same.

But one of the teachers announced it would be £24 per person if we split it. I saw the lady I was sitting next to face drop. She had a curry, rice and coke which came to £14. The teacher had had a meal which cost £11, some rice or noodles, shared a starter and had 6 bottles of beer at £3 each. Hmm, who was getting a good deal there?

So I felt I had to say something mainly for the lady next to me as she was just going to pay it. I was made to feel a bit like I was a tight wad, but for that lady especially, it was a big unfair.

I do think people take advantage sometimes or maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it.

I have been worrying a little about it!

[KeithOP]

definitely unfair, no one could say otherwise and better to pipe up at the time than let it annoy you for days after.

Having said that, me personally, I either say up front I'd prefer to pay for my own (I sometimes make it clear it's because I wont be having much or whatever), or, if I go with the group decision to split, I just pay an even split even if I lose out massively.

It's just one of those things. Over the years I've felt troubled by an uneven split but how far do you go? do you worry about £10? £5? £1? where do you draw the line. It's always been the same with buying rounds... I get a coke and end up buying 3 rounds in which everyone else is having double whisky or whatever and no one else ever thinks it's an issue. Wonder why

I remember one particular evening where the squabbling over a bill got to the point where people were saying "I gave you lifts for a month and you're moaning over £4.50?" and "unfair is me buying you a bottle of whisky for Christmas and you getting me cheap cosmetics" and so it went on. In the end, the poor server worked out everything individually and even then we moved onto "hey mate, not quite got enough, can you lend me a fiver... ".

So... nowadays I'm either very upfront about not being in the split or I go with the flow and dont bother working out what I had, I just give whatever is the even split. Life's too short.

[caj]

Shared staff meals are a problem for me, and a couple of other staff members too. I prefer to pay up front and not split the bill. It's easier that way to fit the budget.

[tspill]

I would have let the person fight her own battle.
I agree there is a problem with "sharing the bill". I generally just go with it as I am not really that bothered. My OH doesnt like it at all as she doesnt eat starters, desserts and doenst drink alcohol so she always loses out. So she will say.
But I would never butt in on someone else's issue. None of my business

[Sweets]

I wouldn’t worry. I would have spoken up and said something too.

There’s splitting the bill and then there’s taking the mick. Maybe that person who had all the beer/food didn’t realise that they were costing more than others, but I’d certainly be the one to speak up.

I’d put it out of your mind if you can OP.

[Guest]

I would have kept quiet, I would not spoil a dinner by arguing about a tenner on somebody else’s behalf.

I don’t think 25 separate bills is practical and so yes some people will have had a bit more for their money and others a bit less. Sometimes on nights out somebody gets the extra round in, it happens.

[Cherrypie]

I would have spoken out - it outrages me that people don’t see the fact that they are drinking and somebody is having a Coke should subsidise them.
I used to be bothered saying anything but not anymore. If I’d have been that person not drinking I’d have said ill just put mine in, Ive not been drinking. Equally if I had been drinking I’d have said no way are we splitting bill it’s not fair on others.
You don’t know people’s personal circumstances, that lady might have been skint and though oh I’ll just drive and order a cheapish meal x

[Dermyst]

I would have said something too, why is it fair to subsidise anothers beer consumption?, I have had in the past that where you are drinking, a limit of two drinks would be included in the split bill after that you would buy out of your own pocket.

[tim17]

This often happens to us when we go out in a group, hate it with a passion and it's always the same people who basically get other supposed friends to help pay for their night out. I'm under strict orders from my OH to keep my mouth shut so don't say anything but I don't forget. Well done for sticking up for the other person.

[Bee happy]

I hate it when this happens,it often happens to me on nights out and I always feel the mean one. I don't mind if it a few £, on my last meal out with friends I had pre ordered a couple bottles of prosecco to be brought to table and had paid in advance (celebrating friends special birthday), I didn't have starter just a simple pasta main course £8 ish some of the others had starters,desserts,garlic bread extra dinks. Bill game and they wanted to split it,think it was over £20 each, I was so angry but felt mean for saying anything 😣