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Old 20 Feb 20, 11:40 AM  
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rasmus
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Both of us have depression-what can we do?

What can we do when both of us have depression?

We only work the summer season so money is now getting tight. Each doctors visit is at least €50 (unless you go to a government doctor-something to avoid at all costs)

Theres just no work here during the winter.

Weve been sick what seems like the entire winter, that's not helping.
The house is a pigsty, neither of us can be bothered to wash (sorry &#128555

We just cant be bothered with life-me more than him.

Does anyone have any ideas (cheap/free) that we can try and do each day to dig ourselves out of this?
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Old 20 Feb 20, 11:50 AM  
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smithlane
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Sorry to hear you’re both going through depression. Having had 3 periods in my life you have my sympathy.
I really would try to get to a doctor, even if it’s just one of you. If that’s really not an option then exercise is an all natural way to help lift your mood, although this isn’t always effective on its own it can be a good first step. Could you go for a gentle jog or even just a long walk once a day.
You’re in Corfu I believe? What’s the weather like there at the moment? Get yourself outside as much as you can. The winter months are draining but we are getting to the end of it now so I hope you can see a little light at the end
Another thing that helps when life gets a little overwhelming is having a list for everything. Cleaning, things to do, shopping, holidays etc. If you can tick each thing off as you do it, it may help in feeling like you’ve achieved something. I have lists for everything!
You say the house is a pigsty, that would be a good place to start as I always feel better when the house is clean

Edited at 11:54 AM.
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:00 PM  
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Mr Tom Morrow
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OP. Like probably 99% of people I don’t understand depression. I do know that I get depressed when it’s raining all the time and I can’t get my jobs done
That’s probably frustration though I suspect.

A rut is easy to get into and hard to get out of. In work I used to tell my long term sick staff that every day the door to come back in was getting psychologically bricked up a bit more and to hurry back and I would look after them

In your case I would focus on two things
Hygiene and the house. Do a list every night and stick to it rigidly with a reward if everything is completed. That could be something as simple as a biscuit.

Best of luck. You know the good times are around the corner and the Winter is nearly shot.
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:01 PM  
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Floridatilly
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It must be so hard if you are both feeling that way so unable to help/boost the other.
Apart from obviously seeking medical advice which I would suggest.
I would take small steps;
Get up: set the alarm and get out of bed, try not to sleep in too much
Groom: wash hair, shave etc have a good old pamper then put some nice clean clothes on.
Exercise: depending on your fitness level, go for a long walk early morning to start the day. Or jog if you feel up to it.
Food: eat healthy, get those vitamins in your body but you can also have a treat.
Clean: make a list of jobs and do it together... put some e music on (I find that helps) and start in one room, (let’s say bedroom) strip the bedding, dust, tidy and de clutter, open windows.
Do one room at a time without overwhelming yourselves
Keep busy: visit friends/family, take walks, do the garden,
De clutter: I find a messy house makes me more depressed. Be brutal and get rid of the stuff you don’t need, clothes and any general items. Put them up for sale, it may even bring you a little cash
Good luck. Do baby steps and take one day at a time 💕
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:25 PM  
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Like Mr T highlighted I don’t understand depression, but You can be assured that both of you being in the same terrible place is not helping.

I’m going to be harsh but this is going to be akin to 2 drug addicts or alcoholics dragging each other down and feeding off each other.

Like I said I don’t I understand depression but the route out of this is to do it together because like drugs or alcohol if you both can’t fight the demon it’s not going to work.

Best of luck.
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:29 PM  
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Sandra & co
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I feel better when everything is tidy, when the place is a mess I feel worse. Walking defiantly helps, get yourselves outdoors, living in Corfu there must be some beautiful places to visit. Getting on buses and exploring must be cheapish and take a packed lunch, the weather in England is getting me down. I want to go on long doggy walks but it keeps raining! Small steps but you need to start to feel better xx
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:43 PM  
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floridasgirl
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I agree with trying to get out and go for a walk. I've never had depression but like most people probably, have low mood days where I 'can't be bothered'. The less I do, the worse I feel. Like someone else says, try and get yourself up and dressed, have a good wash and you will feel better straight away.
I know it not as simple as this to make you feel better but it's a start. Is there no work either of you can get on the winter?
What about volunteering? You might not feel like it but it will give you a purpose and a reason to get up.
Do you have a dog? That would make you get up and get outside!
I really hope you feel better soon
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:44 PM  
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MrsEgg
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There are already some good suggestions here about the small steps and also trying to get outside and exercise.

Also have a look on the mind website, as they have a lot of good information, especially mental health and money.

With regards to work, is there any sort of freelance work you could do in the off-season?
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:46 PM  
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WhereIBelong
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Been there... Sometimes stuff like "the house is a pigsty" makes the problem seem insurmountable - just too "big" to deal with.

Choose one piece of furniture - make it look good. Today it might be about plumping some cushions on the sofa, washing and drying the throw that sits on it. (that's a "small day" for me - when I don't feel capable, when I am overwhelmed and cannot see through the big picture to where to start.)

Have a "happy shelf" - put the photo albums there, the ornament you think of fondly, a nice stone from the beach, a flower in a little vase etc - some days you clean the happy shelf - sit and look at the happy stuff.

One step at a time. Helps to pass the winter drearyness.
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Old 20 Feb 20, 12:47 PM  
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Get a dog take it on the beach, I would love that and don’t think I’d ever be sad again xx
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