Feeling torn

[Loopylooloo]

I started my new job as a youth worker mid November.

Two days prior to starting we got devastating news that my DH has stage IV oesophageal cancer. I still started my job as I really didnt know which way was up, and am not the type of person to let anyone down last minute.

He started chemo treatment Monday this week, so far all ok.

My dilemma is this - am working in a Hostel, where the residents come and go, a few of them are working (one as a carer for elderly) and some at college etc.

Am now worried that I might be putting him at risk, while his immunity is low (I already know the answer to this... ) I just feel awful letting my new employers down so soon, they are really short staffed! We are on list for vaccine, but I dont think that will stop me passing it? Or any other virus!

I just feel so bad. I have never been a quitter and my DH was proud of my getting this job.

[Colette-S]

So sorry to hear your news Louise 💐Would your employer allow you to take some time out if they knew your dilemma?

[lindylou46]

Louise, l don't have any real advice except to say that l am sure your employers would be understanding whatever you decide to do under the very difficult circumstances you are in. I just wanted to wish you and your husband all the very best and send you all good thoughts.

[mickey house]

Louise, I am so sorry about your Hubby and I hope the treatment goes well. I think your concern regards letting your work down shows what a nice person you are, but I agree with Colette and I'm sure your employer would be understanding if you approach them and explain the situation to allow you time off (especially due to the potential risk to hubby).

Remember we are all here for you.

[Loopylooloo]

Originally Posted by Colette-S

So sorry to hear your news Louise 💐Would your employer allow you to take some time out if they knew your dilemma?

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I dont think so... I would feel awful asking as I only just started! They need bodies in the building. They have been very kind about it all so far though.

[maidmarian]

So sorry that this is happening to you hun, like Colette said, if you could explain to your employer and see if they will grant you some time off? Take care of yourself and DH 😘Xx

[Colette-S]

Originally Posted by Loopylooloo

I dont think so... I would feel awful asking as I only just started! They need bodies in the building. They have been very kind about it all so far though.

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If you are able to manage financially I would probably leave. Early days with treatment and he will possibly need you around a bit more. You are outgoing, bright and positive generally and I have no doubt you would find something else when the time is right. You are not a quitter and you are not letting anyone down - you are in an impossible position and trying to make the right choice.

[enjibenji]

So sad but your dh has to come first, perhaps if you explain to your employer they maybe able to hold the job for you. Its hard as your feeling bad about it and like others have said that shows what a caring person you are, good luck with your decision and also for your dh treatment x

[Loopylooloo]

Thanks, its that sickening inevitable feeling (probably like Bojo had when he cancelled Christmas!) I know I need to do it but just hate feeling I have disappointed people.

Thank you for the support and kind words. x

[olgaandcoda]

Your only consideration is to your husband. Everyone should understand and support your situation.
I wish you all the best whatever you decide, but i think you know. Take care xx