I am a warrior but... DD has anorexia... GOOD NEWS UPDATE POST 64!

[alibeau]

So that turned into a tricky morning, DD started vomiting (not by choice, it’s not something she has ever done), she brought up all of today’s food (Sorry if tmi!) so I await a call from the dietitian as both DH and I suspect the amount of food on the planner is just too big an increase in one go…

She’s now sleeping, oh how I wish I could just make this all better for her… poor thing.

Ali x

[Princess Ariel]

I don’t have any words of wisdom or advice, lol can’t imagine what you are going through, sending you lots of love, you are both in my thoughts xxx

[dismamx2]

Ali you are superwoman I've so much admiration for you, I can't even begin to imagine where you get your strength from. Good luck with this chapter x

[aqualiv]

Originally Posted by alibeau

Am I allowed to have an off day please?

DD was finally diagnosed with Anorexia at our appointment on Friday. DD disagrees with this diagnosis, she feels that she just starting to eat less due to anxiety reducing her appetite... nevertheless due to her BMI(14) etc they have to treat her for the worst case scenario and the CAMHS lady said she would be happy to be proven wrong!

DD has been told no school for the next six weeks and we have been given a strict meal planner to stick to with a follow up in six weeks and weekly appointments in the meantime locally. She is gutted as she was desperate to get back to school and felt she had gradually been starting to eat more of her own accord, counselling is/was helping with her anxiety but it just wasn't quick enough progress unfortunately.

We've had an very emotional weekend with hours of conversation and debate about it all, I am exhausted and can feel my anxiety kicking in.

I just feel today that my life has turned into one big sob story since the loss of my DD1 in 2019. I was adamant that I was not going to be that person that people feel sorry for but here I am and I hate it

Any yet equally here I am, sharing my 'sob story' on a public forum, I think I am losing my marbles

Please share your most tackiest cliches and words of wisdom with me to perk up my day, the tackier the better

Ali x

See more...

Why no school or not allowed in the kitchen? Never heard of this approach before

I would have hated this when I had it
Surely no school will affect mental health for the worse

Are they addressing the anxiety/ depression or just the symptom- food intake

[alibeau]

Originally Posted by aqualiv

Why no school or not allowed in the kitchen? Never heard of this approach before

I would have hated this when I had it
Surely no school will affect mental health for the worse

Are they addressing the anxiety/ depression or just the symptom- food intake

See more...

Hi there,

I hope you are doing ok.

No school is due to her low BMI and the need to preserve all the calories she takes in. So the burning of calories whilst walking around school etc is a no go, because she feels anxious at school this would burn more calories and one of the advisors also said that because the brain is a muscle it will not be working very well at the moment and so she’d kinda be wasting her time anyway in terms of absorbing new information

Not allowed in the kitchen is to address control issues I guess and also any pressure placed on parents to reduce portion sizes, high calorie ingredients etc

DD is unhappy about both of the above as she does not see herself as a ‘typical anorexia sufferer’ as she wants to eat and increase calorie intake (I don’t know if this is typical or not?), I do agree with the no school at the minute, I think it’s just too taxing on her…

The priority is to restore her physical health then they will move onto the other stuff but we are currently paying for a private counsellor for her who she sees once a week

Ali x

[aqualiv]

Originally Posted by alibeau

Hi there,

I hope you are doing ok.

No school is due to her low BMI and the need to preserve all the calories she takes in. So the burning of calories whilst walking around school etc is a no go, because she feels anxious at school this would burn more calories and one of the advisors also said that because the brain is a muscle it will not be working very well at the moment and so she’d kinda be wasting her time anyway in terms of absorbing new information

Not allowed in the kitchen is to address control issues I guess and also any pressure placed on parents to reduce portion sizes, high calorie ingredients etc

DD is unhappy about both of the above as she does not see herself as a ‘typical anorexia sufferer’ as she wants to eat and increase calorie intake (I don’t know if this is typical or not?), I do agree with the no school at the minute, I think it’s just too taxing on her…

The priority is to restore her physical health then they will move onto the other stuff but we are currently paying for a private counsellor for her who she sees once a week

Ali x

See more...

Stressful time for all of you
Sending hugs

I actually found my extremely low calorie intake didn’t effect me mentally and I did well in my exams even with missing quite a bit of school
I felt my brain was sharper if that makes sense

[duchy]

I’m sure my cousin’s anorexia was treated with a mix of physical and mental treatment from the off as the less anxious she was the better. (She made a full recovery after needing to drop out of college, finished her education and is now a senior social worker in the US)
I wouldn’t dismiss the possibility that the loss of control caused more anxiety and contributed to the vomiting , maybe something to discuss ?

[shirley]

Just wishing you all well, and as others have said you are amazing and we will be here for you at any time. Hope DD is better once she wakes up, what type of food do they have her on? Your entire family have been through so much, so hoping that this is just the final hurdle for you all to then be able to get back on track xx

[Colette-S]

Originally Posted by alibeau

So that turned into a tricky morning, DD started vomiting (not by choice, it’s not something she has ever done), she brought up all of today’s food (Sorry if tmi!) so I await a call from the dietitian as both DH and I suspect the amount of food on the planner is just too big an increase in one go…

She’s now sleeping, oh how I wish I could just make this all better for her… poor thing.

Ali x

See more...

Being a teenager is hard enough(for them and us). As adults we struggle to make sense of what happened to you so it’s impossible for her. Add the usual hormonal troubles to the trauma and it’s huge but she has amazing support and will hopefully get the right help. One day at a time Ali, you are an amazing Mum ❤️
Offload here anytime, there are some really good listeners - I can vouch for that x

[Wismgari]

I want to start this by saying I know very little about anorexia and eating disorders, but I know a lot about anxiety. I have a severe phobia of vomiting, which has at points in my life restricted my food intake, not because of body image issues but because I was so scared of food making me sick. I then would get so hungry and feel ill through hunger I would eat loads to get rid of the feeling, which would make me feel sick and stop eating for a day... Repeat... Doctors really wanted to diagnose me with binge eating disorder, it took a long time to get someone to understand it was anxiety around something completely different to my body image or calories. I am not saying your daughter doesn't have anorexia, but it is worth being aware of other potential causes.

Also, as an anxiety sufferer the amount of changes that have been put on your daughter in one go would tip me over the edge. Changing so many aspects of my routine and my safety behaviours would send me into a complete melt down. It sounds like she may be struggling too as she was ill after food? Anxiety can definitely upset your stomach (much to my annoyance!). I would really try and get her some help with her anxiety if you can. And work with her to see if there are any little things that could make it easier (seeing friends at home? Getting sent school work? Being allowed in the corner of the kitchen but not being able to help?). I'm definitely not trying to undermine the advice you have been given, I'm just aware as an anxiety sufferer sometimes huge leaps like that feel impossible.

Best of luck to you all