Bullying... what next

[2littleboys]

I have been having a lot of issues with eldest 13 year old son with bullying.

Since starting secondary school I have had multiple episodes including clothing being stolen, PE kit being thrown in a bin, lots of verbal abuse and also bullying through social media with threatening videos being sent.

I have been to the school several times and have also approached the parents of the kids involved and I am not getting anywhere. My son came home from school in floods of tears yesterday again and said that the same two perpetrators were making up rumours about him and spreading it around the school and constantly making fun of him.

It breaks my heart to see him upset like this and I am at the end of my tether with it. He is very soft hearted boy and will not stand up for himself and I think they see him as a soft target so it continues and continues. I really do not know what else do and I see this having an effect on his mental health.

I honestly thought as my boys got older it would get easier - nobody prepared me for the teenage years and social media has so much to answer for!

[Jakey Neverland]

I would stop the social media, my two eldest 14 and 12 have very little to do with social media. It is their choice now but in Yr7 they both wanted it but soon realised how vile people can be and once you put something out there it is there for potentially life.

If school are not taking appropriate action take it further, I personally would be thinking of moving if it has gone on this long and school are not being proactive. Kids can be vile and sadly with social media we have now it makes bullying so much easier.

[2littleboys]

Originally Posted by Jakey Neverland

I would stop the social media,

See more...

I have removed Snapchat and Instagram some time ago however it has moved onto Video messages via Whatsapp.

My husband and I were away for the weekend a few weeks ago and the boys stayed with my parents. The video messages were being sent through the night and my son just lay in bed crying because he didn't want to upset my parents. The videos were vile and making fun of my husband, my parents and me.

[liz-paul]

If the school aren't being helpful then you can try raising it with the chairperson of the board of governors. Alternatively ask to see their complaints procedure as you are unhappy with how they are dealing with things and they may take you more seriously.

[allycat228]

I would make an appointment with the head and ask him/her what he’s / she’s going to do, Plus get in touch with the school governors .

Would it be possible if you know who the perpetrators are getting solicitors letters sent to the families saying if this carries on you will have no choice but to do them for harassment

I am so sorry that your son and the rest of your family by extension are being subjected to this

[Guest]

It is not acceptable for school not to do anything about it. We had this problem with my DS from y7 to y10 until the boys were removed from school so my son could continue at same school.

Look at the schools policies on Bullying - it should slow clearly what is included. At our school it also includes cyber bullying.

It may also be worth talking to local police about it, the link below is really useful for info.
bullying/cyberbull...cyberbullying/

Also take screenshots of anything that you can use for evidence against these boys before it gets deleted. I would also ask DS to remove himself from the Whatsapp group where this is happening. He can also block numbers too.

Hope you can get this sorted, nothing worse than being miserable at school surrounded by the nasty kids doing this to him.

Edit- you can email your concerns to Whatsapp at support@whatsapp.com and they could also help. BTW you should be 16 years old to use Whatsapp.

[Mickie]

As the partner of a teacher she has said previously if you need a school to act then obviously raise it at the highest level ie head teacher or chair if Governors. Ask to see the relevant policies and ask to see evidence that they have followed their policy in this specific case. They should have recorded your concerns you previously raised and recorded the action taken at the very least.

As others have said you probably want to invoke the formal complaint system too.

Her suggestion is to let the Head/Governors know that if your complaint is not resolved you’ll provide the evidence to Ofsted that they don’t in fact follow their own policies for them to use in the next inspection

[TC Devon]

You complain to Head and CC in governors. All bullying complaints should have been logged at school. I’d put everything in writing as well and keep a record.

Would you consider moving schools and giving him a fresh start. X

[Stitchfan626]

How awful. Its good that your son can come to you though and is sharing what is happening.

I agree that you need to escalate this through the school The school has a duty of care and should have a bullying policy. If it were me I'd be going to the Head, then the Gornerners and then escalating to Ofsted. I'd even consider the police. Are you in a position to maybe look at moving schools (not that you should have to do this?

[2littleboys]

I have discussed moving schools with him but he doesn't want to. He does really well at school and is excelling in most of his subjects - however this is just another thing for him to be made fun of, they even make fun of him because of our holiday destination.

Children can be so cruel - I wish I could make it all stop for him.