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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:12 PM  
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PoohBears#1fan
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Help / ideas please for a sensitive Christmas gesture

My DD moved in with her BF this year, none of us have met his parents as his mum is sadly undergoing chemotherapy and is shielding.

I want to send something / reach out to them this Christmas but am a little rubbish at this, I was always trained to write in a very matter of fact way so my well meaning gestures can look curt at times despite me best efforts. I'm so much more of a face to face person!

I've thought of just sending a nice card with a letter introducing ourselves, but also wondered about a hamper / flowers / wine etc.

I really don't want to get this wrong and feel for them so much, they've not met my DD and they won't be able to spend Christmas with the son they've not seen this year

What would you do?

Thank you
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:16 PM  
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olgaandcoda
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A card and hamper would be lovely, but can you just call them and have a chat.
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:17 PM  
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Jan
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I think that sending flowers would be a lovely gesture, rather than food or wine which she might not be able to consume,
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:18 PM  
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PoohBears#1fan
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Originally Posted by Jan View Post
I think that sending flowers would be a lovely gesture, rather than food or wine which she might not be able to consume,
Thank you, this did cross my mind that I'd inadvertently end up sending something that she couldn't have or face having.

Flowers is a great idea.
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:21 PM  
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duchy
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If she is shielding make sure they are OK with packages first , some people leave anything delivered for a couple of days before touching so that’d knock out flowers for example.
A nice letter saying how much you like their son and are looking forward to meeting them when things are safer and wishing them a good Christmas with a nice box of chocolates (check with him if they prefer milk or dark) would be thoughtful.

I’d check with her son as to what she can have so you send something suitable . He will know . Alcohol for example may not be allowed with her medications .

Edited at 01:24 PM.
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:22 PM  
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olgaandcoda
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Just to add, your posts are always written nicely and with thought for us dibbers, I’m sure a message in a card would be written with the same care.
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Old 27 Nov 20, 01:25 PM  
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Originally Posted by duchy View Post
If she is shielding make sure they are OK with packages first , some people leave anything delivered for a couple of days before touching so that’d knock out flowers for example.
A nice letter saying how much you like their son and are looking forward to meeting them when things are safer and wishing them a good Christmas with a nice box of chocolates (check with him if they prefer milk or dark) would be thoughtful.

I’d check with her son as to what she can have so you send something suitable . He will know . Alcohol for example may not be allowed with her medications .
You're so right, I thought this would be so simple until it came to actually doing it!

Originally Posted by olgaandcoda View Post
Just to add, your posts are always written nicely and with thought for us dibbers, I’m sure a message in a card would be written with the same care.
That's really kind of you, thank you, I so often read back what I've written and feel it completely lacks the emotion that I wanted it to convey!
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Old 27 Nov 20, 02:03 PM  
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Originally Posted by PoohBears#1fan View Post
You're so right, I thought this would be so simple until it came to actually doing it!



That's really kind of you, thank you, I so often read back what I've written and feel it completely lacks the emotion that I wanted it to convey!
It’s a lovely idea , just have a chat with their son.
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Old 27 Nov 20, 02:15 PM  
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Originally Posted by olgaandcoda View Post
Just to add, your posts are always written nicely and with thought for us dibbers, I’m sure a message in a card would be written with the same care.
You don’t come across as curt to me either! I think flowers would be a lovely idea. But agree to maybe check with the son just in case she is being funny about deliveries
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Old 27 Nov 20, 03:17 PM  
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When I was having chemotherapy I was told not to have flowers in the house by my oncologist- sorry to put spoke in the works!
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