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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:33 PM  
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#11
duchy
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If they aren’t eating family style my expectation is to tell me before I start cooking (and I’m not cooking something different for adults , what they then choose to do is up to them , if they’ve decided to fend for themselves for that meal . If they get fat or spotty or broke it’s their lookout as adults.)
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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:35 PM  
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I also have one adult 'child' at home, aged 25 and I don't mind if she wants to have a takeaway or cook something different to the two of us, but I do expect her to tell me in advance. If I've been shopping and have a meal for three, she knows better than to mess me around but I've been clear about that since she went off to uni and started living a more independent life.

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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:37 PM  
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megaflyer
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You sound like a wonderful mother - many a child (adult or young) would love to have someone as caring as you at home looking after them .
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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:39 PM  
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Tink Tina
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We tend to eat dinner as a family and my two know they need to tell me in advance if they are out (obviously not at the moment) or ordering a takeaway (usually at weekend). TBH I would be mad if already planned/cooked and they got takeaway
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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:42 PM  
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Sandra & co
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Originally Posted by megaflyer View Post
You sound like a wonderful mother - many a child (adult or young) would love to have someone as caring as you at home looking after them .
My mum was the same, help out family and while they live with you do what you can for them as long as they don’t take the pee! I get them unloading the dishwasher, hoovering, dog walking and a few Jobs but they are very slow lol!
We must be doing something right because my son and his wife are coming back from Canada to live with us and dh is building an extension.
Thank you very kind x
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Old 4 Jan 21, 07:49 PM  
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munmun
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I dont have adult children living at home but if they come to eat with us I do expect they eat what we provide (I would not serve my daughter red meat as I know she wouldn't eat it) I expect this from my grandchildren too.

We lived in Clapham in the 70s and our neighbours were from the US and they talked continuously about Maccy Ds . When the McDs opened in the Strand we used to pile into our old green mini and head down there, parking outside and head in for a Big Mac. The young dont change that much even if they think they do!
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Old 4 Jan 21, 08:01 PM  
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danisleigh
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My son is 19 and he sometimes orders takeout and as long as he isn’t wasting food I cooked then I don’t mind what he does. My son is underweight though so the more he eats the better!
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Old 4 Jan 21, 08:02 PM  
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salmim
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Originally Posted by megaflyer View Post
Growing up we were vegetarian and never had a convenience meal as Mother made everything from scratch. So we ate it as it was made with love - so I now eat whatever someone has made for me and am not at all fussy. If I make food for people I expect them to eat it and would be very hurt, for whatever reason, if they didnt. Apart form being good manners I think all sitting down at a table to eat is good for the soul - living lone and with covid that is the one thing I miss the most but I still sit at the table for every meal - its good practice .
Agree.
We have never in our 40 years of living together ate a meal other than at a table or bar. Couldnt think of anything worse than takeaways in front of the telly!
3 lads never were allowed. As for Macdonalds or KFC drive through!
We did make some timing changes when the football was on a Sunday but dinner was always at the table.
Each to their own though. Adult lads bought takeaways what can you do? But eaten at the table! Never in their rooms.

Edited at 08:03 PM.
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Old 4 Jan 21, 08:08 PM  
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BevS97
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We all eat together so while in theory I wouldn’t mind if they ordered something. In reality we’d probably end up getting something for all of us.
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Old 4 Jan 21, 08:16 PM  
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munmun
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Originally Posted by salmim View Post
Agree.
We have never in our 40 years of living together ate a meal other than at a table or bar. Couldnt think of anything worse than takeaways in front of the telly!
3 lads never were allowed. As for Macdonalds or KFC drive through!
We did make some timing changes when the football was on a Sunday but dinner was always at the table.
Each to their own though. Adult lads bought takeaways what can you do? But eaten at the table! Never in their rooms.
We generally eat at the table, certainly if we are more than two of us but I would hate to be so prescriptive I couldn't have a sandwich watching the telly or reading a book on the sofa.
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