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Unread 10 Aug 16, 08:18 PM  
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#81
daytonababe
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Glad to hear she is having some better dates and that she has a target to aim towards.

End of Oct is a while away yet she'll hopefully be a much stronger person by then..

Enjoy your holiday :-)
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Unread 11 Aug 16, 06:35 AM  
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#82
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Thanks for your thoughts, hasn't stopped a restless night. I saw DD last night , and looked like she was having a better evening. By the time I got home from visiting, she rang DW to tell her that she had drawn all over her arms , and had barricaded herself into her room using a door wedge and pieces of furniture. Just wish we could get the daughter we know and love back
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Unread 11 Aug 16, 07:13 AM  
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#83
Universal VR
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Originally Posted by buryboy View Post
Thanks for your thoughts, hasn't stopped a restless night. I saw DD last night , and looked like she was having a better evening. By the time I got home from visiting, she rang DW to tell her that she had drawn all over her arms , and had barricaded herself into her room using a door wedge and pieces of furniture. Just wish we could get the daughter we know and love back
Your last sentence tore at my heartstrings. My DD has depression, General Anxiety Disorder and OCD and, although she's no where near as poorly as your DD, she's not the girl she once was. It's almost like grieving isn't it? I, too, want my daughter back. My heart goes out to you. I hope your DD makes further progress and you have her back soon.
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Unread 11 Aug 16, 09:42 PM  
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#84
buryboy
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Originally Posted by Universal VR View Post
Your last sentence tore at my heartstrings. My DD has depression, General Anxiety Disorder and OCD and, although she's no where near as poorly as your DD, she's not the girl she once was. It's almost like grieving isn't it? I, too, want my daughter back. My heart goes out to you. I hope your DD makes further progress and you have her back soon.
In a funny kind of way sometimes I manage to divorce myself away from the fact it is my daughter that is in the hospital. With not seeing her every day, sometimes when my DW calls to say DD has said this, or done that, it just seems like she is talking about someone else, because I would never have dreamt a year ago that our daughter was capable of being like she is. I think because a lot of the odd things she does are when she is alone in her bedroom in the unit , rather than with us, it still doesn't seem like her somehow. In a weird kind of way, it would be harder in some ways to live permanently with someone with less severe illness, than to live apart from someone like my DD .

Against that , in a strange way , I find it much harder than dealing with a death, because that is final, and you can move on in your own time. Dealing with our current situation , we never know what the next day will bring and we have no clue how long it will last.
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Unread 10 Sep 16, 07:45 AM  
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#85
buryboy
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Thought I would update you on progress in the last few weeks. This update is the most positive one I have been able to give for a long while
Myself , DW and DS managed to get away on our break in salou. We kept in touch daily by phone and the ward allowed her to Skype her a couple of types which as you can imagine was bitter sweet.
We had a good time over there. Portaventura is a really good well themed park with some really good rides. Our favourites were stampida ( a woodie shaker of a coaster ) and tutuki splash ( a water ride where you get soaked )

DD has since carried on coming home during the day on some days over the weekend. Hasn't always been easy , it really wears you out, but there are signs that she is coming round. She has started talking to DS using the pet name she has for him.

She has signed up for college ( but obviously won't be able to go much) , and on Monday plans to come home for a one night overnight stay. She has a habit of changing her mind as any progress scares her . That would be a massive step forward if she can make it .

It's her 18th birthday next Sunday. She has been umming and ah-ring about what to do for it for weeks. But yesterday she said she wanted the whole family together for a couple of hours, including her grandad and uncle who she hasn't allowed to visit since she went in to hospital 6 months ago.
If she keeps to that, that will be a monstrous step forward .

Her birthday is a big fear for her. She is afraid of the future , and of course any birthday is recognition of growing up but 18 is a big milestone she is nowhere near ready for.

Her weight is about 52kg. Just over 8 stone. Considering her low point was 38.6kg. ( just under 6 stones) she has done remarkably well.

She still doesn't eat " properly " though. Even snack and mealtime is still a drawn out saga. She still fears certain foods, and has made us get Kellogg's cereal in for her overnight stay as that's what's she been used to at the priory. Own brand cereal is "scary" despite it being what she has had for over 17 years.

They are still planning on discharging her end October. It still seems way too soon. We have a meeting to try to get funding extended but don't know how that will go. I'm not sure how we will cope otherwise. We couldn't leave her alone in the house, she wouldn't eat her food for starters , and could well just run off . We will need some serious support from work to manage .


She has agreed to an increase in her medication which seems to be paying off. Don't get be wrong there are still bad days ( she is still marking herself ) and we certainly aren't counting any chickens , as she has gone backwards before, but the general pattern is forwards ( for now at least)
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Unread 10 Sep 16, 08:20 AM  
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#86
daytonababe
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I'm glad you had a good holiday and things are starting to look up for your daughter :-)

The weight gain sound a massive improvement , hope she managed her night at home .

Hopefully the funding will be extended , will she be able to stay where she is once she turns 18 ?
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Unread 10 Sep 16, 08:24 AM  
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#87
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So pleased to hear your update. I appreciate there is a long road ahead, but overall the trajectory of recovery is in the right direction. My thoughts & best wishes are with your whole family
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Unread 10 Sep 16, 08:25 AM  
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Fingers crossed your DD is on the way forward. It must be so hard for you all to watch your child going through this.
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