Son's girlfriend wants to come

[Persnicketty]

Originally Posted by voyagers_uk

We're just going through the same process - my daughter's boyfriend will be coming with us next April. They've been together a year and a half but they're a little younger - only 18. However, unlike you, he practically lives with us so is part of the family already. Still, we are taking some precautions. he's not keen on disney - is more of a wilderness person so we've found some things he'd like to do; we're going to a nature reserve, on an airboat ride and going kayaking with manatees.
I'm asking the two of them to cover the cost of their room at the hard rock which will probs work out at about £400 each. And I will say to them that it would be nice if they offered to pay for the odd meal.
There's a great section in the Unofficial Guide to Walt Disney World that talks about managing expectations with young kids but I think a lot of it is applicable.
So, we will have conversations, many conversations, over the next year that will cover things like how a typical day works, how it's a holiday for everyone so we expect everyone to pitch in when we're at the villa, how if someone is having a bad day and not feeling great that they can stay at home, that if someone is feeling antisocial they are free to go off alone, that it's OK for families to have a bit of a bicker and get a bit grumpy with each other as long as we get over it and move on. We set up some rules regarding 'noises' when he first started staying over and made it clear that we expected them to be discreet. There's only been one occasion where we've had to say that it was audible and they took it onboard.
I think the big thing is communication and honesty. The more you talk about expectation and needs the more everyone will have a clear idea of what the holiday will be like.
Have you thought of going for a cheap weekend break away somewhere together first? It would give you a chance to get to know each other, you could do some planning together and also you could maybe get to see any areas of potential conflict.
I'm sure you will all have a wonderful time!

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A fantastic post. And solid insight.