Personal money question re couples

[Myakka17]

We have separate accounts, we both have a good wage so I don't need to have access to DH's money when I have my own. We share the household bills and savings towards holidays etc...

[Posiesmum]

Originally Posted by bluedave

Actually having read through this thread I could see each and every couple/family do different things to suit them and what works for them is entirely what matters.

One post stood out and gave out alarm bells as seemed a very similar set up my friend and her ex who was financially abusing/controlling her but for years she didn’t see it.

Bizarre is perhaps not the correct term to use but was used to highlight concern. I could and probably did jump to conclusions based on what happened to my friend as it seemed so incredibly similar - financial abuse affects far too many people unfortunately, and many don’t even seem themselves as victims.

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Yes, I saw that post too - rather concerning.

[Floridarules]

Separate accounts, always have and always will. I do find it strange however that anyone would find what others choose to do (which is different to their own situation) strange😳

[munmun]

Originally Posted by Floridarules

Separate accounts, always have and always will. I do find it strange however that anyone would find what others choose to do (which is different to their own situation) strange😳

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I don’t see why people should not see others peoples actions in any part of life strange!

We all lead our lives very differently and have opinions on the best way it should be done. Clearly that’s just our opinion but we could consider anything from what others eat for breakfast to how often they holiday in Florida strange

[WhereIBelong]

Originally Posted by munmun

I don’t see why people should not see others peoples actions in any part of life strange!

We all lead our lives very differently and have opinions on the best way it should be done. Clearly that’s just our opinion but we could consider anything from what others eat for breakfast to how often they holiday in Florida strange

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sometimes it is advantageous to realise things can be strange, or at least to talk about them amongst an anonymous group - after all, nobody knows if their normal is actually normal...

[olgaandcoda]

My friend has a joint account and her own, but she has to hand any receipts she has to her husband. He’s an accountant, and she doesn’t mind. But it would never happen in our house!
I must say, they are very wealthy too, so it’s not as if they need to be careful!
What works for each family is fine!

[FloridaFairy]

We have only joint accounts other than ISA s...

I’m a housewife and dh is the one who works... and has done since I had the children ...
I deal with the household and bills and he lets me get on with it ...
Never an issue about spending or having things ...

As long as the bills are paid and we are happy and healthy that’s all that matters to us

[macy]

We have always had joint accounts , husband has always been the highest earner. Just retired and still working well for us now.

[Vanillapod]

Originally Posted by olgaandcoda

My friend has a joint account and her own, but she has to hand any receipts she has to her husband. He’s an accountant, and she doesn’t mind. But it would never happen in our house!
I must say, they are very wealthy too, so it’s not as if they need to be careful!
What works for each family is fine!

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Blimey! Loads of places don’t even provide receipts now unless you ask.

My maternal grandfather was an accountant and I remember when I cleared his office he had a book open on his desk dated the day he went into hospital with every penny they’d ever spent (there was more than one notebook!)
Each day listed separately.
Incredible really and fascinating to flick through.
Who actually has time for this though?!
I also remember going through the finances with my grandmother as she had no clue what she would need to pay for each month!
When I pointed out the council tax sum her response was one of horror/outrage and

‘Did Charlie know this? He wouldn’t have paid it!’

So funny!

[Floridarules]

Originally Posted by munmun

I don’t see why people should not see others peoples actions in any part of life strange!

We all lead our lives very differently and have opinions on the best way it should be done. Clearly that’s just our opinion but we could consider anything from what others eat for breakfast to how often they holiday in Florida strange

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It’s the word ‘strange’ which I thought odd, maybe ‘interesting’ would have been kinder.

It’s great that we can discuss it openly on here, but I don’t consider others choices on this matter specifically ‘strange’ is all.

👍😄😊