Help me, autistic obsessions

[marypoppins38]

I was 29 when I had my first and we thought we were really prepared. I had 5 nephews so was well used to babies. OMG what a shock to the system DD was. She was wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but it was such hard work.
It’s totally natural to feel broody at your age though, just enjoy the planning for when you do decide fully.

[Bootrip2]

I think Floridatilly had the best idea, you have been down the puppy/kitten route and it hasn’t necessarily filled that need. With a baby the consequences are serious if ‘it doesn’t work out’. Having a baby or even caring in fostering and adoption you are automatically having to put another’s needs ahead of your own, are you really ready for that? I am 36 years into being a ‘parent’, and there’s no sign of it getting any easier. X

[hexagon]

Originally Posted by megaflyer

If you really want a baby then why not look for a sperm doner ? No relationship required

Or why not foster or adopt ? Again as omg as you are stable being single isnt an automatic bar

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I plan to look for a sperm donor in 3-5 years. And have kids that way. Foster or adoption is not for me.

[hexagon]

Thanks guys, it a,ways comes on in the evening usually. I just get so excited lol. I just I dunno, it’s defitnely not just me being broody, that would less hassle. It’s defitnely not helping that I’m autistic. And a doll just wouldn’t do anything, I’d just feel a bit silly.

[Lindaelaine]

Having a baby is a huge responsibility, I know this sounds harsh but do you really think you could cope with more added stress in your life right now?
My advice would be to get yourself mentally and physically prepared before you even consider bringing a child into the world. babies are hard work and it doesn't get any easier as they grow up, it's even harder being a single parent, you really need to think this through as it's such a big commitment to make, especially on your own when you are already struggling with health problems.
Look after yourself, you really need to talk to your therapist about this longing for a baby, i am sure they will be able to give you the best advice about that .

[hexagon]

Originally Posted by Lindaelaine

Having a baby is a huge responsibility, I know this sounds harsh but do you really think you could cope with more added stress in your life right now?
My advice would be to get yourself mentally and physically prepared before you even consider bringing a child into the world. babies are hard work and it doesn't get any easier as they grow up, it's even harder being a single parent, you really need to think this through as it's such a big commitment to make, especially on your own when you are already struggling with health problems.
Look after yourself, you really need to talk to your therapist about this longing for a baby, i am sure they will be able to give you the best advice about that .

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I know, I really know I can’t have baby now, which is why I’m planning fir 3-5 years. That should give me enough time. And if not I can always reevaluate then.

That’s actually a good idea, talking to my psychologist. Thanks.

[EssexSue]

I don't want to sound harsh but you have two cats and want a kitten, well like kittens babies also grow up and change.
I absolutely understand broodiness though please don't think I'm unsympathetic.

[hexagon]

Originally Posted by EssexSue

I don't want to sound harsh but you have two cats and want a kitten, well like kittens babies also grow up and change.
I absolutely understand broodiness though please don't think I'm unsympathetic.

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As much as I want a kittten there’s no way I’m getting one. And I understand I can’t have another cat. So I’m not getting one. I also would like another dog, but that’s also a big no. Same with babies, as much as I can’t stop thinking about them, I don’t want or could cope with one at the moment. I know I need t9 be patient. But when you’re autistic and it’s a special interest it’s all you can think about.

[Bootrip2]

Definetly talk it through with your professionals. It’s not even just about the physical aspect of a donor and pregnancy, there may also be the possibility of social services involvement, which can in itself prove an additional stress. I do completely understand the whole autistic side of it, I have 2 adult sons who are autistic.

[DisneyDaffodil]

Originally Posted by hexagon

As much as I want a kittten there’s no way I’m getting one. And I understand I can’t have another cat. So I’m not getting one. I also would like another dog, but that’s also a big no. Same with babies, as much as I can’t stop thinking about them, I don’t want or could cope with one at the moment. I know I need t9 be patient. But when you’re autistic and it’s a special interest it’s all you can think about.

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It good that you recognise the obsession as part of your autistic traits. Talking to your psychologist could help you further with coping with the feelings.

You always seem to be good at understanding how your medical conditions affect you and making adjustments to deal with the issues. It’s the same with the longing to have a baby, it’s a case of realising perhaps that now isn’t the right time for you but that’s not to say you won’t feel differently in a few more years and be in a better position to consider it.