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5 Jun 19, 03:04 PM |
#11
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Imagineer
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This, it is your house, they are you rules, make them and stand by them.
My kids don't really do housework or cooking off their own backs but if I ask them they wouldn't tell me no ! They are 20 and 18 and although not perfect they would always help me where they can
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5 Jun 19, 03:10 PM |
#12
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Imagineer
Join Date: Aug 08
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He is like this because you are allowing it , time for some tough love , like another poster said , stop feeding him and doing his laundry until he respects what you do for him and helps you out when you need it
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5 Jun 19, 03:12 PM |
#13
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Imagineer
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How old is your daughter Minnie? Is she old enough to look after herself with just needing the older brother there? If she is, I would be pointing out to your eldest that you aren’t asking him to fully babysit, just help you out and check on his sister for one night. I would then point out that you do a lot more for him than that and if he thinks it’s unreasonable then maybe you would stop doing so much for him from now on. There comes a time when they have to realise you are entitled to a bit of help around the house too and he has to pull his weight.
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5 Jun 19, 03:19 PM |
#14
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Apprentice Imagineer
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This would be my suggestion too. Sit him down and tell him if he doesn't starting pulling his weight and contributing you will be changing the wifi password. Hopefully the threat would be enough but if he doesn't change his ways make sure you follow it through.
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5 Jun 19, 03:23 PM |
#15
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Thread Starter
Imagineer
Join Date: Jan 18
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dd is 7 so does need someone to look after her. I've tried sitting him down and switching off the internet nothing works. He just says he's moving out and we say ok then nothing changes.
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5 Jun 19, 03:24 PM |
#16
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Imagineer
Join Date: Jan 11
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Yep I agree with this- you’ve tried talking and asking, you get ignored. Time for one more conversation with him and you calmly tell him as he’s not contributing in any way to the household finances or duties, it’s now up to him to provide his own food, and it’s up to him to do his own housework ie clothes-washing, room-cleaning etc. You’re not asking, you’re telling.
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5 Jun 19, 03:30 PM |
#17
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Imagineer
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I presume you have raised him to be a polite, helpful, decent human being - so what has changed?
Why is he non-cooperative? Why is he being so selfish? He needs to wake up to the fact that he is an adult. Contribute or move out. |
5 Jun 19, 03:32 PM |
#18
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Thread Starter
Imagineer
Join Date: Jan 18
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You guys are so right I think its time for a family meeting and stick with it this time.
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5 Jun 19, 03:42 PM |
#19
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Excited about Disney
Join Date: Jan 18
Location: Essex, UK
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Wow, that's so rude. Definitely stand your ground. My older brother would take advantage as long as he was able. He did always look after me though as he was 8 years older.
I'd be saying take your pick, you look after her for one night or you do your own washing, cleaning and cooking. Then stick to it. Anything he leaves around the house throw in a bin liner and put it back in his room. |
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5 Jun 19, 03:42 PM |
#20
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Imagineer
Join Date: May 08
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I’d wouldn’t just leave your dd with him if he’s not happy looking after her. What if she needs something and he’s not going to do it. I would only leave them together if you sort stuff out with him. My boys are older than dd and did look after her, they usually got on better when we weren’t there. I would give pizza and a film money and ask them to go and have fun together x
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