Teenage Son

[Minnie18]

My ds 19 still lives at home and works full time in his summer job. He pays no housekeeping and does nothing around the house. I asked him today if he would watch dd tonight so me and dh could go away to a hotel for a night. He said no because he would have to get up early to take dd to school.

We are in the middle of expanding our business and my anxiety is on overdrive. We have no family etc to watch dd.

No point to this post really just feeling low.

[Dougie]

Tell him he is looking after your DD ! Remind him of the easy life he has at home !

[Lisa123wm]

My daughter is 19 later this month. She’s also working full time through the summer until she goes back to Uni at the end of September.
She’s doesn’t do a lot around the house, but does pay her way and is always happy to look after her brothers if we want a night away etc.
I think you should have a proper chat to him. I certainly would if it were my daughter.

[Loopylooloo]

Would stop asking and start telling - he needs pay something (even if you keep it for him for later as a deposit on flat or something) he needs help more, and just tell him you are going away and he will need take DD to school. Or, see if she can get there with a friend instead? Tough love needed Minnie! Good luck

[Minnie18]

Thanks so much everyone. We have talked to him time and again about paying and helping and he just ignores us.

[jndt]

Has he always been like that? I know he's a teenager but he's also an adult and he sounds selfish from what you have written.

My oldest 2 are 16 (17 in August) and 14 and although they don't do much around the house they always look after their younger brother - who is 9 and has autism so not a nice easy job. DS1 will watch ds3 tonight for 2 hours while I take ds2 to swim training as dh is at work. I always ask but they never say no if they can do it.

[Minnie18]

Originally Posted by jdndt

Has he always been like that? I know he's a teenager but he's also an adult and he sounds selfish from what you have written.

My oldest 2 are 16 (17 in August) and 14 and although they don't do much around the house they always look after their younger brother - who is 9 and has autism so not a nice easy job. DS1 will watch ds3 tonight for 2 hours while I take ds2 to swim training as dh is at work. I always ask but they never say no if they can do it.

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Yeah he has always been that way. You have hit the nail on the head he is selfish and just lives his live as he wants.

[greekgranny]

Stop feeding and watering him and don't do his washing and cleaning. If he doesn't like it he can always move out.
Just tell him you are going and he will be looking after your daughter and don't stand any nonsense.

[Smilesonfaces]

Originally Posted by greekgranny

Stop feeding and watering him and don't do his washing and cleaning. If he doesn't like it he can always move out.
Just tell him you are going and he will be looking after your daughter and don't stand any nonsense.

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I was about to type the same added with switching the internet off usually my trump card !

[mickeyspal]

I know what I'd be doing if he was mine... showing him the door and making him fend for himself. I bet he'd look after her if you offered to pay him