Not doing birthdays and christmas

[vampiress88]

There were boxes of unopened ones in the bedroom that I have just brought downstairs and there is still a massive bag of toys in the loft.

Think I might rewrap them as someone said then they will get the use out of them. Hopefully by next year we won’t have anything left over in the loft and maybe they will start telling me what presents they want.

For there birthdays I haven’t a clue what to buy them as I obviously don’t want it to be a wasted present but I don’t wanna be buying things for the sake of buying them.

They did stop opening them at our house cos they got fed up but we went to both parents houses and had to keep telling them to open the presents when all they wanted to do was run round and play with the first one and nick the chocolate off the tree.

Really need to look what’s it the loft bag of toys.

[JLH]

You dont have to buy loads but equally you dont have to resort to buying toothbrushes, there is an in-between . My boys never had loads to open but it didnt spoil Christmas , I miss the days when they were so excited to get up and open their presents . I think in years to come you may regret just getting them a stocking with cutlery and toothbrushes in.

[duchy]

I have a rule that the "C word" is banned in the house until 1st December.
With the huge commercial hype for months before it's easy to get jaded or fed up with the whole thing ... or worse give into the pressure that the perfect Christmas is all about excess.

We have proper Christmas dinner and extra treats but don't go completely OTT. We exchange gifts but again don't go bonkers , one major gift per person maximum (plus a few smaller presents). We focus on spending time together without work getting in the way ... and it's much more enjoyable than getting frazzled trying to replicate the "perfect Christmas" depicted on all the daft adverts !

I used to do "Big Christmas" I enjoy it so much more nowadays

[Guest]

You do what's best for you and your family. I always walked my own path much to the chagrin of others.

I learned early on ... You can't please all of the people all of the time so take a step back and please yourself. They won't be happy but you will be happier in the long run...

[disneymadhouse]

I find this post a bit sad if I'm honest. Your children are still so young, and understand the "magic" for such a short time before they don't believe any more. (My DD is nearly 10, and has just worked it out )
Buying cutlery for them would be a normal development thing, like shoes / clothing to me.
I find switching DD's toys around a bit … even laying them out a different way in her room sparks her interest again. I would have a sort out, and get the stuff out the loft now. Then maybe another sort out Oct half term.

[MickeysGirl]

We are also rethinking Christmas this year. My kids both get probably 50 presents including stocking contents and it's ridiculous. I like them to have a big pile and it's completely my fault.

Dh said to me the other week you do realise the toys get bought, plonked in their rooms and then a few months later you're sending me to the charity shop with them - mainly unopened. That opened my eyes a bit!

So this year each child is writing a list of 10 items they want and then they will get a surprise pile in a Santa sack.

We're also reining in family and friends presents, I buy for 29 people usually at least £30 per person (that 29 includes my kids and husband so obviously more on them!) Plus the food, days out etc it's getting out of hand. I bet we spent at least 3.5k last year on Xmas 😫😫😫

I've downloaded a Xmas list app you can set budgets and keep track plus add ideas/links for each person.

[Plato]

It's because we all have too much that we lose the spirit of Christmas and birthdays too.

For most of our children's lives (once we had the awakening) they have had at most 2 large presents and then a regular size stocking with silly little bits in. It is more than enough.

Ask yous kids in summer what they got for the previous Christmas and many will not remember.

We don't buy birthday or Christmas presents for any extended family or friends or even each other any more. We do treat and surprise each other with gifts sometimes through the year, but those gifts mean something and are genuinely wanted rather that being enforced to find things at a particular time of year.

Without being cheesy, it is the things you do, the places you go and the laughs you have that are the things that are important and last. Memories last!

I know it works differently for everyone, but lots of kids get so many treats and presents throughout the year that the value of birthdays and Christmases are diminished.

Chill, relax and enjoy each other's company.

[Guest]

We are also changing how we celebrate Christmas..in our family it has gotten way out of hand. The children were bored of opening presents! We decided to go bigger on birthdays. Now they get better presents for birthdays and we have made Christmas less material.

We will still celebrate but only giving token gifts ..pj's. .Bath sets..new book etc.
We will concentrate more on spending time together and traditions. Bake together and we are going caroling for the first time 😀 I am really looking forward to this year and it's less stressful on family members that feel they need to match expensive gifts

Edited to add. I couldn't give up on Christmas altogether it's a lovely time to enjoy

[MickeysGirl]

And another thing I've decided this year is no Xmas eve box - I'm doing a 1st December box instead. So those new Xmas pyjamas etc can actually be worn through the month and not just on Xmas eve!

[JessBlu]

Yes very few pressies in our house for birthdays / Christmas.

£50 budget for everyone from either Santa kids, or each other for my husband and I.
We do a secret Santa for immediate family, parents, grandparents, siblings, etc again £50 so we only buy one.

Told friends and other family not to buy for us and we are not buying them etc, I normally make some bread with little tags and send out which goes down a treat !

So our bill is
£200 us 4
£100 two secret Santa’s my family
£100 two secret Santa’s his family
£30 for ingredients to make 30 loafs of bread and wrappings.

Total bill £430

Love it! We then spend our money on being away most weekends and our little boat.