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24 Jan 21, 11:49 AM
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VIP Dibber
 
Join Date: Apr 12
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My wife was complaining that I didn't buy her flowers anymore, so I got her some wholemeal and self raising, and she's still not happy.
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tocpe |
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24 Jan 21, 11:56 AM
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VIP Dibber
Join Date: Apr 12
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My dog's nose is made out of liver.
How does it smell? Offal.
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tocpe |
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24 Jan 21, 12:52 PM
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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Elton John has bought a treadmill for his pet rabbit.
It's a little fit bunny... Disney332
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24 Jan 21, 01:23 PM
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Apprentice Imagineer
 
Join Date: Mar 02
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I just phoned the tinnitus help line... it just kept ringing
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Bev
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25 Jan 21, 01:43 PM
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slightly serious Dibber
 
Join Date: Jan 05
Location: Manchester
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My mate told me his wife had nipped out to the shop three days ago for a bottle of milk, and hadn't been seen since.
When I asked him how he was coping he said, 'Not bad... I'm using that powdered stuff... '
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25 Jan 21, 02:27 PM
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Imagineer
Join Date: Jul 19
Location: Wessex
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Diarrhoea Awareness Week... runs till Friday !
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25 Jan 21, 05:02 PM
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VIP Dibber
Join Date: Jul 09
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!
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 If I added it all up I probably could have bought a 4 Bed Detached House
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25 Jan 21, 09:52 PM
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Apprentice Imagineer
Join Date: Mar 02
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I had a call this afternoon from a guy from the ramblers association... he just went on and on and on
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Bev
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25 Jan 21, 10:45 PM
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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I found a tennis ball while out jogging this morning and put it in my running shorts to give my dog when I got home.
As I stopped to wait at the traffic lights, a woman asked me what the large bulge was in my running shorts. "Tennis ball" I said. "Oh, that must be painful,” she replied. “I had tennis elbow once!" Disney332
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25 Jan 21, 10:53 PM
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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Little known war fact. While Alan Turing was busy cracking the Enigma machine his sister Kay provided all the food, drinks and snacks to his co-workers.
Disney332
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