Older parents

[Floridatilly]

I was 40 when I had my youngest, my husband was 42.
It was definitely a lot harder than a decade earlier thats for sure lol

[Rac20]

Originally Posted by Princess Alison

I'm so sorry, this is very sad to read.

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I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you sad. January is obviously a tough time but I consider myself very lucky. I have two beautiful boys who are my whole world.💗

[DisneyDaffodil]

I was 22 and 24 when I had my first two, and I had our third child just 5 days before my 36th birthday.

I had a lot more energy with the first two, but I wasn’t confident in my parenting ability so stressed a lot about whether I was doing things properly. With our younger child, I was more relaxed and I had more patience.

[daytonababe]

24 for my 1st , 28 with my 2nd.

But my granddaughter has always lived with us ( with her mum ) , I was 44 when she was born and I’ve literally been there since she was a few minutes old .
So in many ways it’s like having a 3rd .
Because my daughter was very poorly after her birth I did a lot of her care initially .
Fortunately she slept through pretty much from day 1.

We are also lucky she’s a easy kid , she slotted into all our lives . There’s nothing she’s stopped us doing .

So I guess I could have had another at 43/44 and managed perfectly well wouldn’t be much different to how life is now really


When I had my first a lady I knew was having her first in her early 40s, until then she had worked her way up through her career as a midwife and had never felt ready to have children of her own .

[Princess Alison]

Originally Posted by Rac20

I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you sad. January is obviously a tough time but I consider myself very lucky. I have two beautiful boys who are my whole world.💗

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I'm sorry too to make you worried you made me sad. That wasn't my intention.

I'm so happy that you have two lovely boys.

I'm from a family of all girls and I had a son and Honestly it's been such a blessing. I knew Nothing about boys ! I don't know about you but mine is so loving and it's been a wonderful experience for me

(Caveat he's about to hit adolescence and not sure if that's gonna change things! )

🥰

[Mel49]

I had my first DS at 29, second DS at 37 after secondary infertllity and my DD at 39. DH was a year older. It wasn't quite how I had planned it as Mother Nature had other plans but always said I'd stop trying at 40.

Funnily enough my DD (now 14) was discussing the advantages and disadvantages of older parents the other day. The main disadvantage was losing grandparents (my Mum died this year at 78, my Dad at 80 and my father in law at 90 last year) and the fact that she is likely to lose DH and me while relatively young and if she has kids we will miss out on seeing them grow up. Overall though with our family dynamics there were quite a lot of advantages in her eyes ranging from more tolerance as more life experience, being taught life skills and manners, more caring having had older grandparents who were ill and she felt we cared more about her as a person than some of her friends younger parents. Although we are more "old fashioned" and stricter in some areas she actually made me feel quite good as I always thought she might resent having older parents although she may some day.

[Princess Alison]

Originally Posted by Mel49

I had my first DS at 29, second DS at 37 after secondary infertllity and my DD at 39. DH was a year older. It wasn't quite how I had planned it as Mother Nature had other plans but always said I'd stop trying at 40.

Funnily enough my DD (now 14) was discussing the advantages and disadvantages of older parents the other day. The main disadvantage was losing grandparents (my Mum died this year at 78, my Dad at 80 and my father in law at 90 last year) and the fact that she is likely to lose DH and me while relatively young and if she has kids we will miss out on seeing them grow up. Overall though with our family dynamics there were quite a lot of advantages in her eyes ranging from more tolerance as more life experience, being taught life skills and manners, more caring having had older grandparents who were ill and she felt we cared more about her as a person than some of her friends younger parents. Although we are more "old fashioned" and stricter in some areas she actually made me feel quite good as I always thought she might resent having older parents although she may some day.

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Thank you for sharing this. It's an interesting insight and giving me food for thought.

[jndt]

I had ds1 at 26, ds2 at 28 and ds3 at 33. I definitely found it harder having ds3. I think it was a combination of things - my oldest two were at school, I was 5 years older than my last baby and ds3 has autism (although this wasn't even a thought until SALT mentioned it when he was 2).

ETA I'm now 44 and too old for any more but ds3, age 11, takes up a lot of my time so I have no time for anymore children!

[Kat11]

Had first Dd at just gone 27 and second Dd at 28. I always wanted 4 but would’ve had a few years gap then another two but I got quite poorly at 30 so decided I didn’t have the confidence after that. I have thought about it over the years as I’m good now, but I believe you need to be healthy and confident to have a baby so haven’t tried.

I’m too old now (45) so going to wait to be a grandma 🤞🏼.

I’m such a lucky lady to have the two beautiful girls we have. 😍

Just too add. I always planned on kids whilst I was young as my mum and Nanna had early menopause’s at 30 & 31 so needed to make sure.

Kat

[louiseybobs]

I had my one and only at 24 I'm 31 now

My parents had us young, my mum and dad had 3 children before they were 20.
Losing dad this year made me realise how lucky we were that they had us so young, I got to have my dad for 31 years before he passed away.

And my grandad, he was the best grandad, I had him for 27 years, he was young at 73 when he died.