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10 Oct 20, 12:13 PM |
#471
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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Irish animal rights activists have raided a turkey farm just outside Dublin. apparently, they got away with over 5000 birds.
A spokesman for the group said they will be releasing them back into the wild once they have defrosted. Disney332
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10 Oct 20, 12:19 PM |
#472
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Thread Starter
VIP Dibber
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An Irishman goes to the doctor, who after examining him says
“You have some problems with your heart, but if you take these tablets, I think it will be okay. “So the doctor gives the man the tablets and the patient asks, “Do I have to take them every day?” No,” replies the doctor, “take one on the Monday, skip the Tuesday, take one on the Wednesday, skip the Thursday and go on like that. “Two weeks later the doctor is walking down the street, and he sees the patient’s wife.“Hello Mrs Murphy,” he says, “how’s your husband?” “Oh he died of a heart attack,” says Mrs Murphy. “I’m very sorry to hear that,” says the doctor, “I thought if he took those tablets he would be all right.” “Oh the tablets were fine,” says Mrs Murphy, “It was all the skipping that killed him!” |
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10 Oct 20, 12:24 PM |
#473
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Thread Starter
VIP Dibber
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Racing is a national pastime, I soon got accustomed to the Reverend fathers, rushing past me to get a bet on at the race track. My mate Trev spotted one Reverend father making a big fuss of a horse in the parade ring. Amazingly the horse went on to win the next race easily. We took great interest when we saw the same Reverend father bless another horse in the next race, blow me, this horse won too. Well we were hot on the Reverend father's coat tails for the third race and as soon as he patted a horse called Foxy Loxy, we raced off to get the best odds we could with the bookies. Foxy Loxy was well up with the pace on the first circuit, but down the back straight for the second time, Foxy Loxy dropped to the rear. Then to our chagrin it dropped dead by the water jump. When we went back to the bar we fell into conversation with a local, and told him the tale of the Reverend father. 'Be gora' he said, 'you have to learn the difference between when Reverend Murphy is blessing a horse and when he is giving it the last rites' .
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10 Oct 20, 12:27 PM |
#474
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Thread Starter
VIP Dibber
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Just a note loved reading all the jokes but keep them clean for on here as it a Family forum we all know the rude jokes but let’s keep them for other forums
Thanks all keep the going |
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10 Oct 20, 04:32 PM |
#475
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Imagineer
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Edited at 05:24 PM. |
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10 Oct 20, 04:55 PM |
#476
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Thread Starter
VIP Dibber
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10 Oct 20, 06:08 PM |
#477
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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Some guy on Facebook called Buster, keeps sending me videos of ‘70’s glam rock band Sweet. Getting really annoying now, tried everything to stop this, but no success... does anyone know the way? There has to be a way... to block Buster .
Disney332
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10 Oct 20, 07:20 PM |
#478
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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I’ve just tried some of Elvis Costello's mediterranean-inspired sausages.
I can't see them catching on myself, but apparently olive salami is here to stay. Disney332
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10 Oct 20, 07:39 PM |
#479
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Imagineer
Join Date: Oct 09
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Historians in Ireland have discovered what they believe to be the headstone of the oldest ever living man.
He was 193 and his name was Miles from Dublin. Disney332
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10 Oct 20, 08:06 PM |
#480
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Thread Starter
VIP Dibber
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A carload of hunters, on holiday, were looking for a place to hunt, pulled into a farmer's yard in County Waterford, Ireland. The driver, Brannagh, went up to the farmhouse to ask permission to hunt on the farmer's land. The old farmer said, 'Sure you can hunt, but would you be doing me a favour? That old donkey standing over there is 20 years old and sick with cancer, but I don't have the heart to kill her. Would you do it for me?' Brannagh replied, 'Of course I will,' and strolled back to the car. While walking back, however, Brannagh decided to play a trick on his hunting friends. He got into the car and when they asked if the farmer had said if it was alright, he said, 'No, we can't hunt here, but I'm going to teach that old fellow a lesson he won't forget.' With that, the Irishman rolled down his window, stuck his gun out and shot the donkey. As he shouted, 'To be sure, that will teach him,' a second shot rang out from the passenger side and one of his hunting mates yelled, 'And me, begorrah, I got the cow.'
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