Clingy 8 year old

[skb 123]

Originally Posted by vowels

I have to disagree with not volunteering at children's clubs.

If everyone had that attitude, there would be very few activities for most children to attend. I know it is a massive problem at my children's Scout Group and for after school clubs/socials.
I think ot is admirable that you are training to be a coach.

Please do not think there is only one way to solve this wee problem. Your daughter will learn to be more independent, part of being a parent is knowing when to give them that push!

See more...

It can end up being a case of "damned if you do, damned if you don't ". My DH was a scout leader and both my kids went through his troop. It was a real eye opener how many kids as well as parents would accuse the leadership of favouritism when in fact my kids felt it was the exact opposite.

When you are qualified as a coach (and I wish you all the best in that), be prepared for the parents who think your DD got her place on the "team" only because you're a coach.

[Hannah]

Originally Posted by skb 123

When you are qualified as a coach (and I wish you all the best in that), be prepared for the parents who think your DD got her place on the "team" only because you're a coach.

See more...

Luckily they are already in a squad (which they have to be invited to) and which was done before I was involved 😊 they compete as a squad rather than being invited into a smaller team thereafter. I am not a judge though, thank goodness!

[vowels]

Do not define yourself by other people's experience of volunteering. Most people do find it rewarding.

skb123, that is unfortunate that people thought that your children received special attention because their father volunteered as a leader. Really mean spirited.

Most of the leaders in my children's Scout Group have children in various sections and I have never heard anyone complain of favoritism. In school, the children do not care which parents are helping, just that someone is there.

Sorry, this is me on my soapbox, people not offering to help at their children's activities, even occasionally, drives me nuts, hence my admiration for Hannah committing to coaching gymnastics.

Back to your clingy dilemma, your daughter will grow out of it. In the meantime, try any suggestion made which you think might be suitable but, please, do not worry, it is just a symptom of her love for you.

[PPM]

Originally Posted by FlorayG

I'm afraid behavioural science would disagree with every word of this.

See more...

Worked for my two lads, but we didn’t read any behavioural science books, we just did what both our sets of parents did to us.
Just relaying our experience, your methods may be the way ahead now.

[anna68]

I’ve got an 8 yr old only child daughter. She’s a dream most the time but definitely becomes more childish and clingy when I am present and other children are interacting with me. For her it is absolutely a jealousy or threat she perceived as normally she has no one else interacting with me. Obviously we are all different but my daughter is pretty mature and understands her behaviour and what is acceptable or not. And I would parent this in a firm way because 8 isn’t a toddler and there is a firm understanding of what they are being asked to do and what is acceptable. However as I say we are all different. I do think those saying there is nothing wrong with her desire to be with you are correct in a way but also deeply flawed in another. We have to develop our children to be people independent in their own right and not dependent on others and this doesn’t mean not showering them in love but it does sometimes mean not being their bestest friend in the world. I respect we won’t all agree on that but it’s my opinion 😊 hope you can work out what’s right for you

[Andybear]

A reward programme is what people do to train dogs!

[vowels]

And husbands.