letting your teenage child use public transport on their own

[BucksBugsy]

Originally Posted by scooby99

An (almost) empty London tube station reminds me of American Werewolf in London and gives me the creeps!

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There were very few mainline trains coming into euston hence the lack of people

[Morganza]

Two weeks after her 18th birthday, my daughter went to Australia on her own - no relatives, no organised trip, just booked her flight and organised a hostel for a fortnight and then worked her way around for 18 months.

Both children travelled about on buses and trains from pre-teens.

I hitchhiked to Greece at 17 on my own (not really on my own as there were loads of people doing this back in the 70s. There was always someone to chum up with for part of the journey)

The best safeguard from danger is being confident. Over-sheltering of children isn't doing them any favours.

[dreamadream]

No way, but then I am a very nervous nelly and always imagine the worst.
BUT my aunt and uncle find it hilarious how paranoid I am. They live abroad a lot of their kids lives, with the kids at boarding school in the UK (yeah I know, and they judge ME! )
One time they lived in Papua New Guinea. Their then 12 year old flew from the UK on her own, which is bad enough. But there was a delay for the connection and no one met her at Singapore airport, so she went into the city for the day on her own! She said it was a great adventure. Her parents act like its a character building opportunity! Which to be fair it probably is as she is a massive big wig in a male strong industry! This was about 30 years ago but still gives me the shivers!

[BucksBugsy]

Changing subject slightly I remember going to a school meeting for parents whose children were going on a year 3 residential trip.

I was really surprised that some children had never been apart from their parents for a single night in their lives.

My son has been encouraged to do this through sleepovers and activities with the scouting movement.

At the age of 15 he has just been awarded his 100 nights away badge which is an achievement I am proud of (and so is he)

[duchy]

I do think it does depend on their transport "experience"
As kids although we had a car my Mum didn't drive so we were very accustomed to buses and in school holidays train journeys for days out in London and other places. It was quite normal so when we both hit eleven and moved to secondary school I got the bus, my brother got the train with very little stress (I think we both did one dry run each) however if we'd always being driven everywhere or walked it might have been a far bigger deal and more of a learning curve. We both worked in central London in our teens , I was seventeen and I had two social lives one in my home town and one in London so often travelled home late or when connections were messed up.
Fast forward and when my ASD son was twelve his Dad decided he couldn't be bothered driving to pick him up for visits so they started to meet halfway which happened to be a big London rail terminus . At first I took him,then put him on the (direct) train and eventually he'd walk from home to the station too. He loved it and dealt with replacement bus service and delays without even telling me or needing to ring. Knowing he had a mobile so if he got stuck he could ring helped me, however his view was it was important to have to check train times or delays

I do believe public transport is one of those steps to independence and all kids should be comfortable using it from early teens even if it's not essential to do so but just instilling the confidence that they CAN.

Originally Posted by BerkshireBugsy

I beginning to think that the problem is me and my concern!

I do a lot of travelling on public transport and most of it is at peak time.

For example I came into London Euston this morning and all I could see in front of me was a sea of people all pushing and shoving.

I think the idea of doing a dry run is a good call.

Thanks again everyone.

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[Bestbubba]

When I was little my grandparents lived at the seaside. From the age of 6, with big sister aged 9, mum and dad would put us on the train in London, tell the guard what carriage we were in, and our grandparents met us at the other end! We did this every school holiday till we were teenagers.This was the 50s. Social services would probably have taken us into care if they tried it today!

[PPM]

One of our lads went on a weeks holiday to Majorca with his mates when he was 17. He was fine. We had decided that it was time to start cutting the ties.

[BucksBugsy]

Originally Posted by PPM

One of our lads went on a weeks holiday to Majorca with his mates when he was 17. He was fine. We had decided that it was time to start cutting the ties.

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Now this is an interesting one (in my mind) because my daughter wanted to go away somewhere with her mates when she was 19 but I was up for her going but her mum wasnt so sure. But she went and had a brilliant time (not sure pathos would agree!) And came back safely.

So it seems the majority rule is it's ok (back to my original post) and who am I to disagree with the dibb!

[duchy]

My parents were considered very over protective by my peers (they were "older parents) and I probably didn't have a sleepover or stayed anywhere without them until I was fifteen ... but public transport didn't phase them at all maybe because my Dad grew up in central London and my Mum lived there from nineteen so to them it was a very everyday thing to use public transport ?
Perhaps driving our kids everywhere isn't the favour we think it is ? Lol

Originally Posted by BerkshireBugsy

Changing subject slightly I remember going to a school meeting for parents whose children were going on a year 3 residential trip.

I was really surprised that some children had never been apart from their parents for a single night in their lives.

My son has been encouraged to do this through sleepovers and activities with the scouting movement.

At the age of 15 he has just been awarded his 100 nights away badge which is an achievement I am proud of (and so is he)

See more...

[duchy]

Originally Posted by PPM

One of our lads went on a weeks holiday to Majorca with his mates when he was 17. He was fine. We had decided that it was time to start cutting the ties.

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I went on my first work business trip at 17 to Cyprus , I think my parents had to really hide how tough they found that.