When does the sadness ease ?

[sully301]

so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is devastating, i felt so sad for quite a few months after the death of my last dog Charlie. it does start to feel better though and you can think of them with smiles. Big hugs

[Morty]

So sorry you are feeling like this. It is such early days though and I don’t think you should feel any pressure to feel any different. We lost our Cat, Donald, in May. Just like when we have lost family, the pain has eased over time and the feeling of loss and emptiness has slowly passed in the main. We can now look back at photos and remember with far less tears!

[skalexander]

We said goodbye to our boy in May last year, aged 7. I still get teary about it and miss him dreadfully, even though we have two other dogs who I love to pieces. They’re a member of the family, despite not being human, and you can’t put a time limit on grief.

[Floridatilly]

I am so sorry you are going through this. There is no time scale to grieving and please don’t feel silly, your pet is a huge part of the family. Time is a healer and you will get through this one day at a time. Please take care, sending you my love x x x x

[Gull]

18 years is a huge amount of time to have that unconditional love and joy that dogs give, so it will hurt like hell. They really are part of the family, especially to the one who does the most with them and for them.
I’m still hurting over losing one of my girls earlier in the year, and like you, never want to go through it again. I do still have her sister, but after that, don’t want to go through it again.
It would be more strange if you just got on with life as if they hadn’t been there. Do what’s right for you and grieve your way xx

[Lostbrain]

Grief is a strange thing, it's so unpredictable and can be so all consuming. I haven't had a dog, but I've found in the past pieces of advise invaluable in dealing with grief. The first was to accept that you won't stop being sad, you will learn to live with the sad. I was very stuck feeling awful for months about a death and couldn't seem to get over it - when I accepted that I wouldn't get over it I felt so much better.

The other is an analogy where grief is like a ball inside you and it hits you and you feel terrible, at first the ball is really big and it hits you frequently, as time goes of the ball shrinks, it still hits you from time to time and it you can't predict when it will thump you with a wave of sadness, but over time it gets easier to live with.

So sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself.

[Mqt]

First of all, I’m so sorry for your loss. What you are feeling is very normal. I wouldn’t have said so a few years ago, before having a dog myself. Having gone through the terrible experience of losing her, I completely understand how you’re feeling, just like others on here.

You’re experiencing grief and you need to be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to grieve. Just like when any loved one dies, there are no hard and fast rules.

When I lost my dog, I was recommended a book called ‘Going Home. Finding Peace When Pets Die’ by Jon Katz. It gets generally good reviews although not everyone found it helpful. It might be worth having a look at the reviews and deciding if it might be worth a read. I found it useful myself. Take care.

[Bootrip2]

Took us about 6 years toget over our last girl, such a huge void to fill. When the time is right you will know. I still think of both our old girls and smile. X

[Jillzo]

Sending you love and hugs x we lost our boy quite suddenly in July and honestly we are still struggling, they are such a big part of the family and there is just such a huge void. I get comfort that I have his ashes in the house, I know that isn't for everyone but it helps us.

[ClaireNJ]

I’m so sorry for your loss ❤️
18 years is a long time to have him in your lives
Xx