RSVP Rant

[mitch84]

Originally Posted by Scaramouche

This is my worry. Our venue is an hour away and I’m worried people won’t turn up for the evening. And we’re having an extra 90! We have to pay for every guest for the evening, there is no reduction we have to pay for 100%. Our venue is £96 a head for the day and £17.50 a head for the evening.

I am dreading the RSVP process!

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I have had far more issues with the local evening people than my side, for my side no one is local, but the venue had £59 bed and breakfast rooms for those attending the wedding, so they weighed it up and booked a room if they fancied it.
Whereas I think the people nearby have been like oh yeah sure, and then like Universal VR says, other stuff comes along etc.
What food are you going for? Can you knock 10/15% off RSVP numbers, because I wish I had

[Scaramouche]

Originally Posted by mitch84

I have had far more issues with the local evening people than my side, for my side no one is local, but the venue had £59 bed and breakfast rooms for those attending the wedding, so they weighed it up and booked a room if they fancied it.
Whereas I think the people nearby have been like oh yeah sure, and then like Universal VR says, other stuff comes along etc.
What food are you going for? Can you knock 10/15% off RSVP numbers, because I wish I had

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No we can’t, our venue charges per person and will not accept only catering for a percentage. They’re really quite strict.
Yeah I’m hoping once people have booked rooms they will come. Cause the rooms will already be paid for so they’re idiots if not!

The venue isn’t local for anyone we are the closest at an hour away. Most will be an hour and a half, the rest 2+ hours.

[mitch84]

Originally Posted by Scaramouche

No we can’t, our venue charges per person and will not accept only catering for a percentage. They’re really quite strict.
Yeah I’m hoping once people have booked rooms they will come. Cause the rooms will already be paid for so they’re idiots if not!

The venue isn’t local for anyone we are the closest at an hour away. Most will be an hour and a half, the rest 2+ hours.

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How would they know though? Will they take names? You obviously wouldn’t say you are having 90 and paying for 80, but how would they know. Some will drop out, and as people arrive at different times etc I wouldn’t have thought they would count?

[Connies Mummy]

Getting RSVPs for invites to our wedding was the most stressful thing about the whole wedding planning, so I completely understand... rant away it won’t change the situation but it does get it off your chest!

[SquishTheWhale]

Totally feel your pain and it happens to everyone who gets married. Our venue was around £75 a head for the whole day package, and we had 6 people drop out last minute for various reasons. The money hurts and we had to jig the table plan grrr.

Thankfully did not have any uninvited guests turn up as we would have sent them away! One of DHs friends did assume he could bring some random girl he slept with a week ago in the place of his long term girlfriend he just broke up with. Um no. The invite was to him and his gf named, not a 'plus one'. We had a fairly small wedding and didn't want random people we had no idea who they were!

When my sister got married she wasn't going to invite a work colleage but she wheeled so much and dropped so many hints that my sister cracked and invited her whole family of 5, obviously paying for them all.
The day before the wedding she messaged saying they won't be attending as they can't afford it. Fuming isn't the word!

[goodevans]

DD gets married next year and if the RSVP response is anything like the one for her 30th Birthday party last year I will not be impressed!

As others have said some people are just rude and inconsiderate even when they have been told the deadline and that the venue are charging per head and need to know numbers!

Very odd indeed that we had two couples pull out at about a week to go with the same excuse ... they had totally forgotten that it was their child's birthday that day ... What !

Absolutely love the Wedding RSVP card seen on Pinterest with this line on the bottom

" P.S. If you do not reply by October 1st please bring a chair and a sandwich "

[Scaramouche]

Originally Posted by mitch84

How would they know though? Will they take names? You obviously wouldn’t say you are having 90 and paying for 80, but how would they know. Some will drop out, and as people arrive at different times etc I wouldn’t have thought they would count?

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I am hoping to just tell them we’ve got 80 coming, but they’re so strict with things that I’m just going to keep an eye on what they’re saying haha. I’m sure 10 people won’t turn up so it will be fine 😂. It’s a beautiful venue and the staff are so helpful, but they are so rigid!

[Scaramouche]

Originally Posted by goodevans

DD gets married next year and if the RSVP response is anything like the one for her 30th Birthday party last year I will not be impressed!

As others have said some people are just rude and inconsiderate even when they have been told the deadline and that the venue are charging per head and need to know numbers!

Very odd indeed that we had two couples pull out at about a week to go with the same excuse ... they had totally forgotten that it was their child's birthday that day ... What !

Absolutely love the Wedding RSVP card seen on Pinterest with this line on the bottom

" P.S. If you do not reply by October 1st please bring a chair and a sandwich "

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I have absolutely considered putting that line on.

Think I will just send a bulk text saying if we haven’t heard from you by ... we will assume you are unable to attend. For those I have to chase.

My friend put this on hers and it worked

[Smilesonfaces]

For a couple of weddings recently we were sent rsvp cards with stamped addressed envelopes. People don’t have an excuse then. Personally I don’t think texts are a good idea as they are soon forgotten. If I have a card to send back I am much less likely to forget.

[mitch84]

Originally Posted by Smilesonfaces

For a couple of weddings recently we were sent rsvp cards with stamped addressed envelopes. People don’t have an excuse then. Personally I don’t think texts are a good idea as they are soon forgotten. If I have a card to send back I am much less likely to forget.

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I did do that for our day guests, but made them pay their own stamp (they had an e-mail/text option if they wanted).
We knew our hotel could accommodate an extra 50 guests for the evening, but I knew most of mine wouldn't come due to cost/distance etc, we wanted to invite a good 70 odd people so no one was offended or left out.
I ordered some simple evening invites which we sent out with a text RSVP request on the bottom. Unfortunately the full RSVP option with a second card and envelope were a lot more expensive.
I think we'll end up with about an additional 30 guests, which is a nice number really, I just wish we had allowed a reduction in guests for this happening