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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:12 PM  
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PoohBears#1fan
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Empty nesters - give me your tips please!

Youngest baby bird is due to fly the nest next month and I'm so not ready for this!

I remember when DD went off to Uni, I had to give myself a good talking to as was acting like I'd suffered a bereavement, I missed her so much and could barely walk past her room without getting upset.

Really pleased for them and I've always encouraged my kids to spread their wings and get out there living life, they don't know that I pine for them when they're not here!

We have a pretty busy life anyway, I have a job I love, great colleagues, a good friend network that I meet up with regularly & hobbies so I don't need tips of filling time, it's just more coping mechanisms.

How did your life change / you cope with this big new chapter?
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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:23 PM  
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Gryff
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We never really had that total empty nest because of the age span of the boys we had grandkids before the last one moved out and then we graduated to the granny flat or in laws suite when one moved back with the grandson
Just be proud you have given them both the confidence to fly the coop
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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:37 PM  
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EssexSue
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I have never completely got over it I don't think so I'm no help. It doesn't occupy my every waking hour or anything but there's always that little tiny ache. It was especially bad last Christmas for obvious reasons.
On the other hand I'm proud of the fact my children have all made lives for themselves, own their own homes, seem to be in stable relationships and have given us eight gorgeous grandchildren so its all good really.

Edited at 12:40 PM.
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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:48 PM  
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shirley
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This was me 2 years ago, spent months dreading it. August came and I got very tearful, occasionally distraught. Night before taking him to Manchester was awful. But it actually wasn’t that bad once he was away. I did miss him but actually enjoy the quiet and my other 2 are always popping in or on the phone. My son does come home fairly regularly, so sometimes I don’t have time to really miss him, esp since COVID cut into his 1St year, hoping his 3rd year is more typical of the student life xx just go with the flow, get emotional if you need to , no one will criticise you , after all you are a mum xxx
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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:59 PM  
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Glee Fan
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Whenever I think about it I can feel myself welling up. However I’m immensely proud of them both, and like you, we’ve always encouraged them to follow their dreams and spread their wings, but I know I’m going to feel a bit lost when our household goes from 4 to 2 pretty much overnight. The joy of twins! I have no advice for you as I know I’m going to be rubbish, but just wanted to say you’re not alone 🥰
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Old 4 Aug 21, 12:59 PM  
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parisdisneyfan
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We moved house thinking they weren’t coming home to live! Ha ha, ds has moved back properly but at least now has a job so is out during the day. Dd comes back 1-2 times a month at the weekends and Dh retired so I haven’t had a chance to enjoy the house on my own.

When we have been on our own, it is nice just to make a meal, chat and generally live in a tidy house. Sorry not much help, obviously not a doting mum like the rest of you🥴
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Old 4 Aug 21, 01:04 PM  
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Lola
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It helped us that DD went to my old uni so I knew what she would be doing induction wise and the place itself. I did miss her but it got easier with time and nowadays keeping in touch is simple. Hardest was leaving her in a London bedsit a few years later as she made her way career wise. Like the other person I am pleased she has made a success of her career, she lives in a great place in Central London and is married to a lovely husband but Last Christmas was hard and I didn’t see her for 18 months. They managed a visit last month and it was great. There’s a saying along the line of successful parenting is letting go which put it well in my opinion.
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Old 4 Aug 21, 01:28 PM  
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PABBY
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My best advice is to try and make sure they don't come back!

Now, that might sound harsh, but once you've got over the initial pining you will soon get used to having your home to yourself. Why put yourself through it all again?
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Old 4 Aug 21, 01:34 PM  
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DS left home at only 16 to join the Forces (still a child!) and I was distraught. We couldn't shake DD off - she was here till she was turned 30, so when she moved out I had the (metaphorical) bunting hanging up
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Old 4 Aug 21, 01:57 PM  
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They’ll be back! Dd left at 18 and came back at 21
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