Notices
General Chat This forum is for general topics and chat type threads.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:26 PM  
Link to this Post
#1
Reereef
Imagineer
 
Reereef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 12

Reereef's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Teen son not making decision about holiday

Hi there!

I have a teen boy, who will be 17 in June.

He’s a sensible kid for the most part, but he’s in two minds about whether to come on holiday with us this summer.

We have planned 4.5 weeks in Florida. Including a Disney Cruise.

He has a new(ish) girlfriend (3 months) and doesn’t want to leave her.

I have more to book for this holiday and things that will need to be cancelled if he decides not to come along…preferably before I lose money.

The problem is…he doesn’t want to make a decision yet. He says it’s ‘lose lose’ for him.

If he decides to come with us, he misses out on seeing his girlfriend.

If he decides to stay home, she works two jobs so he might not see her much anyway and he misses out on Florida. Or she might finish with him before we go.

Just a note: he sometimes doesn’t see her for 2-3 weeks at a time due to her jobs and they don’t go to the same school.

I’ve offered for him to join us just for two weeks…not good enough.

He is simply dragging out this decision and I am getting anxious as I have so much I’d like to book or change depending.

I’ve just had two years of no holiday planning due to covid…and now with *122 days* to go, I can’t plan due to an indecisive 17 year old.

I’ve paid for flights and car and the main accommodation…I have more accommodation to book and tickets etc.

Am I being selfish trying to hurry him to make a decision? He gets cross when I bring it up and it turns into an argument.

Any advice?

Thank you 😊
__________________
Reereef is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:29 PM  
Link to this Post
#2
Reereef
Thread Starter
Imagineer
 
Reereef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 12

Reereef's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Sorry, just to add. I have tried to set deadlines…similarly this turns into an argument that I’m putting too much pressure on him.
__________________
Reereef is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:33 PM  
Link to this Post
#3
mitch84
Imagineer
 
mitch84's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 06

mitch84's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Restaurant Reviews: 8
I’d just tell him he’s either in our out, and if a decision isn’t made he’s out.
At that age I would likely have stayed at home, or done a week, but I just couldn’t have done 4.5 weeks. I was quite independent though, had a car and a job and a boyfriend. I lost the thrill for family holidays from 13 though unless I had a friend, I would go to my Dad’s (divorced)
__________________
Mitch xx
mitch84 is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:33 PM  
Link to this Post
#4
EssexSue
VIP Dibber

 
EssexSue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 09
Location: South West Essex
Mobile

I think 4 weeks is a long time for a boy that age to be away.
EssexSue is online now Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:37 PM  
Link to this Post
#5
Mpet
Very Serious Dibber
 
Join Date: Oct 03
I think I’d make it clear that there is a final date to make a decision as you will lose money otherwise. At 17 he should understand this.

Once the date has been reached, and he hasn’t made a decision, I would go ahead and cancel his booking. I think that’s more than fair.
Mpet is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:37 PM  
Link to this Post
#6
Reereef
Thread Starter
Imagineer
 
Reereef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 12

Reereef's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Originally Posted by EssexSue View Post
I think 4 weeks is a long time for a boy that age to be away.
I agree, and I have no issue with adjusting his holiday down to one or two weeks…or just leaving him home with frequent visits from his Nan, gramps and auntie.
I just need him to decide what he wants to do.
__________________
Reereef is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:37 PM  
Link to this Post
#7
debs2028
Imagineer
 
debs2028's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 06
It’s a long time to be on his own though . Honestly think the shortened holiday would be best idea . Just need to check with airline they allow 17 yr old’s to travel on own . I’d try and persuade him to do this 😀
debs2028 is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:39 PM  
Link to this Post
#8
Reereef
Thread Starter
Imagineer
 
Reereef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 12

Reereef's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Originally Posted by Mpet View Post
I think I’d make it clear that there is a final date to make a decision as you will lose money otherwise. At 17 he should understand this.

Once the date has been reached, and he hasn’t made a decision, I would go ahead and cancel his booking. I think that’s more than fair.
We’ve done this. And he understands…but he’s also saying that’s ‘pressure’.

Of course it is 🤷

I think he is hoping somehow he can decide close to the date when he knows the score with his GF.
__________________
Reereef is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:41 PM  
Link to this Post
#9
Reereef
Thread Starter
Imagineer
 
Reereef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 12

Reereef's Reviews
Hotel Reviews: 1
Originally Posted by debs2028 View Post
It’s a long time to be on his own though . Honestly think the shortened holiday would be best idea . Just need to check with airline they allow 17 yr old’s to travel on own . I’d try and persuade him to do this 😀
We have agreed that if he stays home, he’ll spend a few nights up nans, then a few nights home. Then a few nights back up nans etc
When he’s at home, my sister will check on him occasionally. She lives a 5 min drive away and has to pass daily.
__________________
Reereef is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Old 26 Mar 22, 12:42 PM  
Link to this Post
#10
mandco
VIP Dibber
 
mandco's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 08
I know it’s hard but you really need to give him a set time to decide at this point I’d only give a few days a week max and after that if he hasn’t decide for himself you make the decision for him- and tell him now what that will be even if you decide to let him do a 2 week split make a decision & stick to it. You’ve given him enough options and have tried to accommodate his situation.
It may be he’s hoping if he drags it out long enough you’ll decide and he won’t have to that way he’s not responsible for any fall out with the girlfriend?

Yes it’s a tough age but ultimately he is old enough to make a decision and it’s not fair on you to keeping waiting indefinitely when you have things to book or cancel based on what he decides.

My ds will be 17 in the summer and has already said he doesn’t want to come with us next time
mandco is offline Girl Mouse Click to view Members Trip Plans Add Member to Ignore List
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 07:57 AM.


Powered by vBulletin - Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
DIBB Savings
AttractionTickets.com

Get £10 off each Disney Ticket with the code ATDIBB10

Get up to £50 off per room at Disney or Universal with the code DIBBHOTELS


theDIBB Blog
One of the the five worlds found in Epic Universe, How to Train Your Dragon... Read More »
Disney announced that a new nighttime show, “Disney Dreams That Soar,” will run nightly at... Read More »
Walt Disney World Resort guests can get ready to have a “glowing’’ good time when... Read More »


theDIBB Menu


Exchange Rates
US Dollar Rates
ASDA  $1.2354
CaxtonFX  $1.2305
Covent Garden FX  $1.2544
FAIRFX  $1.2350
John Lewis  $1.2380
M&S  $1.2178
Sainsburys  $1.2354
TESCO  $1.2364
Travelex  $1.2353
Updated: 06:30 29/03/2024
Euro Rates
ASDA  €1.1447
CaxtonFX  €1.1421
Covent Garden FX  €1.1526
FAIRFX  €1.1432
John Lewis  €1.1457
M&S  €1.1263
Sainsburys  €1.1440
TESCO  €1.1445
Travelex  €1.1435
Updated: 06:30 29/03/2024

DIBB Premium Membership
Did you know you can help support theDIBB with Premium Membership?

Check out this link for more information and benefits, such as...

"No adverts on theDIBB Forums"

Upgrade Now



X