Just need to vent - Kids being mean to other kids!

[silverfox46]

I fully understand how it feels, or as a grandma like me sees it. My grandson who is now 8 is a very intelligent, gregarious soul. He greets everyone in the street, wants to be friends with all his pals at school and not an ounce of malice in him.
It breaks my heart when , at say , school team events he’s always the last to be picked. He doesn’t like sport much , no interest in football like the others , so they leave him to the end. I know it hurts him as it shows in his face. I would rather him grow up with respect for others, enjoy his unique interest in planets etc than be the popular one just because he can kick a ball.
Your children sound like solid individuals who will overcome all this

[DUNXandWILL]

Originally Posted by iLaura

OP just wanted to message to send some gentle hugs your way.

With your DD, it can be difficult girls can often be very spiteful when they want to be. You’re doing all the right things by telling her how special, unique and smart she is. A lot of incredibly creative people have an autism spectrum diagnosis, so maybe discuss some of those with your DD (Mozart, Michaelangelo, Einstein).
Does she have any hobbies outside of school where she can meet friends? Brownies, dancing, gymnastics etc? They can help provide an additional support network.

With your DS, the boys probably weren’t being intentionally unkind - they just don’t tend to realise how what they say can come across. I think the fact your son seemed happy enough going to the party suggests it probably isn’t an issue. But make sure he knows he can talk to you if he needs to (as I’m sure he does)

Maybe have a biscuit with the cuppa! Xx

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iLaura,

Thanks for reading and replying :-)

You're absolutely right about the girls, they are much worse than I can remember from school, so spiteful and just all out nasty!

Our DD does have a couple of hobbies but they are lone things to do (swimming and guitar lessons) but she is toying with the idea of going to drama classes which i'm all for as I do think it'll open her up to showing her emotions in a positive way, build confidence and make some friends external to school! She did used to attend gymnastics which she was excellent at but her Hyper mobility put paid to her chances of carrying on unfortunately :-(

You're totally right about our DS, he had a fantastic time at the party and is (luckily) completely oblivious to me being upset. Mind you i'd rather deal with boys all the time compared to seeing what my daughter has been put through with girls... and that's so far, she's only P5!

Thanks again for your thoughts.

Dunx x

[Mr Tom Morrow]

Originally Posted by DUNXandWILL

Mr Morrow,

Thank you for taking the time to read and reply, much appreciated 👌

You're very right about the swinging emotions and behaviours, I need to keep my sarcastic tongue under control 🤣

Lesson learnt today about not getting involved (unless physical/bullying) my son bounced out of the party having had THE best time ever!

Thank you for the compliment on our parenting skills, we're trying our best👌

Many thanks again

Dunx

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Far too many years to reflect back on for my 2. I do remember though my Daughter sailed through school with what all the Teachers described as one of the best year groups ever.
My Son though had what I would describe as a horrible year group. Some bullies, some nut cases and some who were lovely. A real mixed bunch.
One of his class is now doing life for murder!

Sadly what you get is what you get.

On the other foot my Granddaughter is getting a tough time also and she is only 8. What do you do when an 8 year old has her lunch thrown away and gets called names because she has ham sandwiches and a vegetarian child says it's wrong. Dear God.

[DUNXandWILL]

Originally Posted by silverfox46

I fully understand how it feels, or as a grandma like me sees it. My grandson who is now 8 is a very intelligent, gregarious soul. He greets everyone in the street, wants to be friends with all his pals at school and not an ounce of malice in him.
It breaks my heart when , at say , school team events he’s always the last to be picked. He doesn’t like sport much , no interest in football like the others , so they leave him to the end. I know it hurts him as it shows in his face. I would rather him grow up with respect for others, enjoy his unique interest in planets etc than be the popular one just because he can kick a ball.
Your children sound like solid individuals who will overcome all this

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Silverfox46,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply :-)

Your grandson sounds EXACTLY like my son! Like 100% and you're totally correct, i'd rather he grows up a well rounded young man than try and fit in with the crowd!

DS came home last week telling me that all the boys in his class were calling him a geek, so he just told them that people said that about Bill Gates and Steve Jobs and look at what they achieved... to which most of them looked puzzled and asked who these me were!

Thanks for the compliment about the kids, we're trying our best :-) Just an over emotional mummy! I'm an older mum, i'm 42 and DD is 9 and DS is 7 so i'm not sure if that doesn't help things.

Again thanks for your thoughts.

Dunx x

[DUNXandWILL]

Originally Posted by Mr Tom Morrow

Far too many years to reflect back on for my 2. I do remember though my Daughter sailed through school with what all the Teachers described as one of the best year groups ever.
My Son though had what I would describe as a horrible year group[. Some bullies, some nut cases and some who were lovely. A real mixed bunch.
One of his class is now doing life for murder!

Sadly what you get is what you get.

On the other foot my Granddaughter is getting a tough time also and she is only 8. What do you do when an 8 year old has her lunch thrown away and gets called names because she has ham sandwiches and a vegetarian child says it's wrong. Dear God.

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100% Mr Morrow,

It's pot luck and sods law as to what we get. I only hope and pray what doesn't kill them, will make them stronger and if it doesn't...then me and DH will be there to pick up the pieces and put them back together again

I fear for the future if your poor Granddaughter can't eat her ham sandwich in peace the mind boggles!

Sending out positive thoughts and pixie dust for all our struggling kids

Dunx

[EssexSue]

I hate all these stories, kids have always been mean to each other but I do think it's got worse now some think they are something special, encouraged by their parents!

[Bootrip2]

Your poor DD, i hope that she can get this sorted. I hate it when others are mean to kids. My DD has autism as an added extra to her diagnoses, she really struggles when out of "safe" environment which isnt highly supervised. She was being picked on at the gym recently, lickily they stamped that out straight away. Brownies was also a bit of a challenge so pleased she giving that a rest for a while.

[Floridatilly]

Originally Posted by Mr Tom Morrow

OP. Not a good week but it will be swings and roundabouts. Children can be little angels and little devils. Normally within the same hour!

My mantra was never to get involved unless it was physical or out and out bullying. Also the what comes around goes around saying is invariably right.

Best of luck you sound great parents.

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I must say I completely agree!
With 3 children life has been an emotional rollercoaster of tears and joy.
My advice, as mentioned above, is not to get involved unless it’s physical.
Unfortunately being a parent can be heartbreaking, we want our children to be happy and healthy and it’s not always so.
At least your children have a wonderful caring parent 💕

[DUNXandWILL]

Originally Posted by Bootrip2

Your poor DD, i hope that she can get this sorted. I hate it when others are mean to kids. My DD has autism as an added extra to her diagnoses, she really struggles when out of "safe" environment which isnt highly supervised. She was being picked on at the gym recently, lickily they stamped that out straight away. Brownies was also a bit of a challenge so pleased she giving that a rest for a while.

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Bootrip2,

Thanks for your time and thoughts 👍

Our DD didn't get on well at Brownies, too many opinionated wee females I'm afraid and DD just doesn't have the confidence to stand up for herself 😥

The school have been good but there's only so much they can do.

I'm just hoping that everything is settled down after the kids return after October week.

Thanks again Dunx

[DUNXandWILL]

Originally Posted by Floridatilly

I must say I completely agree!
With 3 children life has been an emotional rollercoaster of tears and joy.
My advice, as mentioned above, is not to get involved unless it’s physical.
Unfortunately being a parent can be heartbreaking, we want our children to be happy and healthy and it’s not always so.
At least your children have a wonderful caring parent 💕

See more...

Floridatilly,

Thank you for taking the time to read and reply 😊

I feel like I'm on the biggest of roller-coasters at the moment, I mean we're trying our absolute hardest to support DD but it's emotionally exhausting 😔

Thank you for the compliment, we're really trying our very best to support and guide our kids the best way we can.

Dunx x