What do people think ( update post 93 )

[Pjamas]

Sounds like coercive control to me too. She won’t risk the hell he’d put her through by going - it takes such bravery and desperation to break that cycle I doubt this is the time that will prompt that. Be there for her, be her safe place and stay close - part of the abuse is the distancing the abused from their support. The best thing you can do is stay close. Maybe in the future you can enjoy more things with her.

[Bozza]

Originally Posted by Rac20

But has he said that himself? Or has the wife said that to the SIL? Without us knowing the guy, we don’t know his views.

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The OP is talking about her own brother. You think she'd have an idea what he's like.

Oh yes, she does. As she said:

"My brother has a very traditional marriage but thought he had mellowed over the years"

So, there's form, a track record if you will that is not based on what the SIL may or may not have said recently.

[debs2028]

Well , I got a message this morning that my sister in law is able to come away with us . I’m not sure what has happened to change his mind but I did not contact him as I was still mulling things over . I’m actually proud of him for doing this as I know he will not have found it easy .
Really happy my sister in law can join us . Thank you for all your advice .

[Pino_Spetzberg]

That's brilliant news.

[daisymae]

Glad your SIL is able to go. Enjoy your girlie trip away x

[Chloeoeysmum]

Brilliant news! Have a wonderful trip

[taylaboo]

Great news. Have a fabulous trip.

[Talland 2016]

That's brilliant news
Have a great family catch up

[ClaireNJ]

Great to hear have a lovely holiday for your Daughters Birthday 🎂

[honeybun1989]

Fab news, have a lovely trip xx