So annoyed - Hidden Disability Lanyard

[Gill H]

Prebooked not precooked! Darn autocorrect.

[alkel2730]

Originally Posted by TeeKayDawn

I say this as someone with a brother who is now in his 50's and was branded a 'naughty child' as a youngster as autism wasn't really a 'thing' unless very severe (I'm talking mute where communication was limited.

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So essentially unless someone is mute to you their autism is not really a ‘thing’? Just bad parenting allowing their kids to meltdown and not learn better coping mechanisms?

[THOscar]

Originally Posted by alkel2730

So essentially unless someone is mute to you their autism is not really a ‘thing’? Just bad parenting allowing their kids to meltdown and not learn better coping mechanisms?

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I think you're completely misunderstanding the poster there.

[nadya]

Originally Posted by alkel2730

So essentially unless someone is mute to you their autism is not really a ‘thing’? Just bad parenting allowing their kids to meltdown and not learn better coping mechanisms?

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Actually I found the post quite offensive too as the mother of two boys with asd.they are both liable to meltdowns despite many years of me helping them with coping mechanisms it doesn't always help.i do my utmost but they still struggle at times and its disheartening to hear that people may think I cant be bothered!

[alkel2730]

Originally Posted by nadya

Actually I found the post quite offensive too as the mother of two boys with asd.they are both liable to meltdowns despite many years of me helping them with coping mechanisms it doesn't always help.i do my utmost but they still struggle at times and its disheartening to hear that people may think I cant be bothered!

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It is downright offensive, dismissive and smacks of someone with extremely little understanding or education of the condition.

I say this as a mother of a child with suspected autism and who has spent all afternoon on the phone to a team of therapists and specialists talking about coping mechanisms. I say this as a mother who went out and studied autism so now I have a qualification in the condition. I say this as a mother who is paying for private help for my child and working two jobs to do this. And I say this as a mother who despite all this still has a child who regularly meltsdown with sensory overload.

I do hope I misread it.

[alkel2730]

Sorry op I came to help you but have been sidetracked. I don’t know the answer but if you haven’t left yet they do these in some supermarkets now and they are exactly the same as far as I am aware as they are universally recognised. I hope your flight is okay and you manage to get things sorted.

[nadya]

Originally Posted by alkel2730

It is downright offensive, dismissive and smacks of someone with extremely little understanding or education of the condition.

I say this as a mother of a child with suspected autism and who has spent all afternoon on the phone to a team of therapists and specialists talking about coping mechanisms. I say this as a mother who went out and studied autism so now I have a qualification in the condition. I say this as a mother who is paying for private help for my child and working two jobs to do this. And I say this as a mother who despite all this still has a child who regularly meltsdown with sensory overload.

I do hope I misread it.

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Yes I agree,I have done years of my own research into autism,been to every seminar I could get to,every charity and parenting group associated with it ,paid for private help and learnt a raft of techniques and strategies and they still have difficulties as I would expect.Its very hard and the thought that I'm just not bothered is upsetting,I couldn't care or try more than I do its exhausting,but worth every moment for my boys.

[TeeKayDawn]

Originally Posted by alkel2730

So essentially unless someone is mute to you their autism is not really a ‘thing’? Just bad parenting allowing their kids to meltdown and not learn better coping mechanisms?

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Not at all I was trying to explain how it was viewed when my brother was growing up, did I say I accept this to be the only possible form of autism?, no!

We went through years of pleading for help and even saw my brother in trouble with the authorities as an adult due to his meltdowns. But there was no care at all back then.

I’m fully aware of how difficult it is to get assistance now, so imagine how it was then with no services at all and being told he was just naughty.
But that’s a discussion for a different thread.

My point was that others are seeing the lanyard as a facility only for children specifically with autism when it isn’t.

No disability hidden or not, severe or not deserves questioning by others over the eligibility for assistance.

[TeeKayDawn]

Originally Posted by THOscar

I think you're completely misunderstanding the poster there.

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Thank you, what I have said has obviously been misconstrued.

[alkel2730]

Originally Posted by TeeKayDawn

Not at all I was trying to explain how it was viewed when my brother was growing up, did I say I accept this to be the only possible form of autism?, no!

We went through years of pleading for help and even saw my brother in trouble with the authorities as an adult due to his meltdowns. But there was no care at all back then.

I’m fully aware of how difficult it is to get assistance now, so imagine how it was then with no services at all and being told he was just naughty.

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Thank you for explaining. Your post wasn’t clear and I am relieved I read it wrong and hold my hands up to that and apologise.

It is impossible to accurately judge from a distance why a child is having a meltdown, no one has any idea bar that child and their parents. I feel strongly over changing perceptions of autism and getting the right help at the right time. I am thankful that things are changing, people are becoming more educated and attitudes are shifting but we are a long, long way away from where we need to be and judgemental opinions are not well received.

I am pleased that you have been involved in your brothers fight and I hope that your brother is getting the help he needs and deserves now.

I loath derailing threads so I will step out now but if you would like to discuss further please do feel free to PM me.