Talk to someone... anyone! Sensitive post

[Princess Ariel]

This post is absolutely heartbreaking, working as a MH nurse I’ve seen the effects of suicide first hand. On a personal note my DS (20) continues to struggle with both his mental and physical health, he’s currently in hospital at the moment because he stopped taking his insulin again. He gets so low in mood due to his diabetes and no matter how much support he gets and how often I literally beg him to come and talk to us, or the crisis team he keeps it all to himself and ends up back in hospital, he will admit sometimes that he feels terribly low but when he talks to services he just says he’s fine and they discharge him.
I’m terrified and live with the fact that there is a very very strong possibility that one day it will be too late 😢

[EssexSue]

Originally Posted by Princess Ariel

This post is absolutely heartbreaking, working as a MH nurse I’ve seen the effects of suicide first hand. On a personal note my DS (20) continues to struggle with both his mental and physical health, he’s currently in hospital at the moment because he stopped taking his insulin again. He gets so low in mood due to his diabetes and no matter how much support he gets and how often I literally beg him to come and talk to us, or the crisis team he keeps it all to himself and ends up back in hospital, he will admit sometimes that he feels terribly low but when he talks to services he just says he’s fine and they discharge him.
I’m terrified and live with the fact that there is a very very strong possibility that one day it will be too late 😢

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I am guessing it's easier for him because he stops taking his medication which is different to doing something pro active. Not a helpful comment just thinking aloud.

[Princess Ariel]

Originally Posted by EssexSue

I am guessing it's easier for him because he stops taking his medication which is different to doing something pro active. Not a helpful comment just thinking aloud.

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Yes Sue you are exactly right which makes it all the more dangerous in some ways...it’s so easy for him (I don’t mean that how it sounds) to just ‘give up’ and stop injecting, he has had lots of help and support but then just disengages from everyone. He’s just contacted me to say he’s self discharging from hospital today without seeing his diabetic nurse or the Mental Health Liasion team tomorrow, this is his second admission in a month so he really needs to be assessed by them but no matter what I said he was adamant he wants to leave 😢

[EssexSue]

Originally Posted by Princess Ariel

Yes Sue you are exactly right which makes it all the more dangerous in some ways...it’s so easy for him (I don’t mean that how it sounds) to just ‘give up’ and stop injecting, he has had lots of help and support but then just disengages from everyone. He’s just contacted me to say he’s self discharging from hospital today without seeing his diabetic nurse or the Mental Health Liasion team tomorrow, this is his second admission in a month so he really needs to be assessed by them but no matter what I said he was adamant he wants to leave 😢

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I'm glad you understood what I meant.
You poor thing you are going to have your hands full the next few days. Hugs x

[DisneyDaffodil]

It’s so difficult to respond to the sad stories on here, a like doesn’t seem appropriate but I guess the posters understand that it’s to show support and sympathy.

The thread does show that suicide affects the family members left behind in such a terribly sad way too which seems impossible to cope with.

[Hel22]

Originally Posted by Bigkitty266

My husband also took his own life in 2011 when our youngest was only 14mths old he has suffered from depression but it did come as a massive shock. He hung himself in our home while we all slept.

He was always the life and soul of any occasion and other than very close family he never discussed his depression or the fact he had it, so this came as an even big shock for people who knew him.

The whole thing has been an horrendous time in our lives as if finding your husband isn’t bad enough then you have alsorts of people trampling through your home family, friends, police, ambulance crew etc, then comes statements, funeral, inquests and the biggest shocker blame ! Other than an auntie and uncle all of his family blamed me “i drove him to it” and they have never seen our 4 children since. Some of our friends have disappeared too.

Life changes after death, but life after suicide changes massively 😔

His sister also took her own life in the same way, 2 years to the day after my husband did, funnily enough though his mother didn’t blame her husband, and from what I hear is fully still involved in his life and the two grandchildren’s life.

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I am so so sorry to read this and so many other people's grief and difficulties. My love and best wishes flow to you all. As a specialist community mental health practitioner of 30 years I echo what others have said please please if at all possible talk or communicate in some form with others if you possibly can. Mental illness is a terrible, consuming, misunderstood illness but it is possible to reach some chinks of light with support. Many people do want to help and will walk the journey of recovery with you. Lots of love and light Hx

[munmun]

Originally Posted by EssexSue

I am afraid I would say the wrong thing and make things worse! But I would never turn anyone away. X

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Sue, if things are so bad someone is contemplating suicide you will never make it worse, actually all you have to do is listen and say very little.

[ROBBOTOO]

My nephew took his own life in 2011. He was 23.

No one saw it coming. He seemed confident, was very popular and had loads of friends.

He rang my sister a day or so before he took his life, taking the micky out of her and I for going to a Boyzone concert.

Everything seemed normal.

Our lives changed forever a day or so later.

No-one saw it coming. He seemed happy and had loads of family and friends who loved him and so sadly for whatever reason he felt he couldn't turn to. All have been devastated by his loss.

He’d always give me a hug and say he loved me when I left him. If I’d known that last time I saw him that it would be the last time I’d ever see him, I’d have hung onto him and never let him go.

For anyone who has lost a loved one or friend in this way, my thoughts are with you all.

x

[parisdisneyfan]

One of my daughters Uni class mates took her own life last week. Although she wasn't close it has still come as a shock to her and upset her. Please let people know how great they are and how much you love them so that they don't feel alone xxxx

[birdiesX4]

Originally Posted by TC Devon

So very sad. I’m so sorry to read this. I had terrible pnd after both children, more so after my second child.
Awful thoughts of just ending it, used to plan it in my head. I never tried to do it. I told my Dh how low I was. I told GP (twice) they ignored me, said I was just sleep deprived.
I’ve no idea what my turning point was, I did end up seeing a different gp. I started on some medication, no longer on it now. I’m so much better.

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I can relate to this . I had no clue how poorly I was and it never occurred to me that I could have PND after my second child was born. My husband did everything he could but honestly it wasn't enough. He worked full time and took on board practically all the household chores as well as the childcare when he was home. My parents wouldn't have anything to do with us as they said mental health illness was embarrassing. They said if they 'pandered' to me it would allow me to continue. As a result i tried to climb down into the sea one night. I couldn't see a way forward at all and thought my husband and children would be much better without me. My husband was exhausted and my kids didn't have the mum they deserved.

A man caught me on the rocks and climbed down and spent an age talking to me asking me about my family and what they meant and what would they think if i didn't go home. Would my children think I didn't love them enough to try and get better?

It was years ago, my youngest is now 23 but i remember everything about that night. I didn't tell anyone for ages then broke down at a routine health visitor check up. She was my saviour. She called round whenever she was passing and said she had called for a brew, sometimes helping me with the kids but generally just sitting with me and asking me about stuff. I will always be grateful. Like others it didn't occur to me to try and explain how I feel. I felt bad for the feelings I had and useless and had no clue I was ill.