Withdrawing / suspending University and teaching assistant advice

[BevS97]

In the school where I work we have teaching assistants with no qualifications right through to teaching assistants with specific HLTA qualifications or other degrees. There seem to be many routes in to being a TA.

I thought you needed to have done some volunteer work in a school to get onto a teaching course but I guess with Covid that’s been more difficult this past few years.

Time in a school will give her the chance to see if it’s the environment for her or not. And a better idea of what sort of role she’d like in that environment. She could work as a TA for a few years and then decide actually she’d like to qualify as a teacher.

[Ds4ljs]

Wishing you DD all the best. I can’t offer answers as such but as a primary teacher of over 25 years I can say it’s a great job but can be very stressful. I’ve seen many colleagues suffer with their mental health for a variety of reasons.

I echo what others have said and think that there are lots of way forward to gain further experience and build confidence. Working as a TA would be a great move. Hard work but a fantastic way of seeing life in a school from a different angle.

[buryboy]

Originally Posted by Carrotstickz

RE financial implications and what happens if she suspends her studies for a bit to build confidence — best thing to do if she goes that route is for her to speak to someone within the university Student Services department or an advisor at the Student Union.

Each university handles finances slightly differently and has different rules for how long suspensions can be. It may be the case that she will need to provide evidence of her anxiety issues to allow for the suspension to occur and extend her course length for example.

She’ll also need to speak with a tutor on her course about suspending, but best to check the regulations on how that can happen first — academics are great but don’t always know the ins and outs and hows and whys of doing the actual process!

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Thanks
Re the anxiety . This should be well known to the uni.
She has had 3 occupational health appointments around her anxiety / possible autism / eating disorder. Though they have been a waste of time and more a worry than a help .

My concern other than the timescale is getting through to the right people - especially over Easter . It seems hard for DD to get help anyway from tutors but as you say they probably won’t know all the answers - when answers are needed ref the technical side ( ie benefit to completing the year at least) as well as the financial side

We can afford whichever but it seems daft to land her with more student debt than necessary ( though half of me thinks that unless she qualifies I don’t see her earning enough to pay it back anyway )

[buryboy]

Originally Posted by BevS97

In the school where I work we have teaching assistants with no qualifications right through to teaching assistants with specific HLTA qualifications or other degrees. There seem to be many routes in to being a TA.

I thought you needed to have done some volunteer work in a school to get onto a teaching course but I guess with Covid that’s been more difficult this past few years.

Time in a school will give her the chance to see if it’s the environment for her or not. And a better idea of what sort of role she’d like in that environment. She could work as a TA for a few years and then decide actually she’d like to qualify as a teacher.

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Thanks
There has never been any suggestion she needed to have volunteered in a school before .
I wish now she had tried to do this recently off her own back in the last few months

We have been saying for the last couple of months - just get to the placement and see how it goes . That’s more ‘ real life ‘ than a uni course .
But she does seem to have hit a bit of a wall
- trying to do her current assignment
- having to do 2 more years with assignments in when every one stresses her out ( I guess as time goes on it is more placement and less assignment )
- the anxiety of what actually working in a school is like and if she can deal with it
- the worries her autism assessment and bone density scan are bringing

[vanlou]

Sometimes you just have to advise the options and then let your child make the decision, whether you agree with that decision or not. My eldest had a wobble as soon as she moved to uni (before she had even started her uni course). Youngest had a wobble 1/2 way through her 1st year. In both cases we just said what we thought but abided by their decisions. Eldest came home, youngest stuck with it. For both of them, in the long run, they made the right decisions, even if I secretly did not agree with eldest leaving initially .
With eldest, we were told as long as she hadn’t received the loan we could cancel it. So for maintenance loan you should be able to stop the 3rd instalment, however not sure if all the tuition fee is paid up front, so that may be repayable in full.
Good luck x

[buryboy]

Originally Posted by vanlou

Sometimes you just have to advise the options and then let your child make the decision, whether you agree with that decision or not. My eldest had a wobble as soon as she moved to uni (before she had even started her uni course). Youngest had a wobble 1/2 way through her 1st year. In both cases we just said what we thought but abided by their decisions. Eldest came home, youngest stuck with it. For both of them, in the long run, they made the right decisions, even if I secretly did not agree with eldest leaving initially .
With eldest, we were told as long as she hadn’t received the loan we could cancel it. So for maintenance loan you should be able to stop the 3rd instalment, however not sure if all the tuition fee is paid up front, so that may be repayable in full.
Good luck x

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Thanks . Reading ucas it definitely appears the tuition fee is paid term by term . Just the timing and value of each I am not 100% sure on but appears we aren’t passed the cutoff for third term YET.

The other issue is that DD just can’t make decisions . That’s not being harsh , that’s just the way it is and has been for a number of years . Her anxiety / eating disorder problems relate partly to not wanting to grow up and hence she really struggles to make ‘ grown up ‘ decisions.

I would be hoppy for my son to make his own decisions and live / die with them - I just feel my daughter isn’t that able to do that - I wish she could !

[duchy]

My autistic son can’t make decisions either.
It’s I think to do with the autism making everything very black and white with few greys in between. Fear of making the “wrong” decision sends his anxiety off the scale.

It’s tough to know when to push and when to hold back.

[CRUELLA]

Not any advice as such but wow does this parenting thing get any easier! We are having some uni related issues with both eldest ds s -give me my 10 year olds issues any day .good luck with everything it’s so stressful .hope you get it sorted and your dd is happy X

[Aliloo]

I think, and I know it’s easy to say, encourage her to separate the money from the course. Teaching is rewarding career but sadly it’s not all about spending time with the children. The drop out rate is high and the pressure of the job is insane currently. I wouldn’t recommend anyone force their way through the course for another 2/3 years to realise teaching isn’t for them. I’d suggest she talks to her uni mentor early about the support uni can offer on this placement and give it a go but if she starts and doesn’t love it, I’d consider the options early.

[Bootrip2]

No idea on the financial side or practical uni side of things. I have followed you and your DD/family updates and admire how well you support her in very challenging situation. DD suffers with anxiety, which is hard to sit by and watch. Although to outside world she is very confident she crumbles at home sometimes.
It is tough having to make such an important decision quickly and without being able to get advice.
I think I would be on the side of if she really doesn’t feel able to cope to support her in quitting, and to maybe look at the TA route, where she would still be doing the interaction that she would love without the massive responsibility of a full class. I think she could also look at other jobs with children/carers, 1:1 support for children with additional needs etc, she sounds like she is a wonderful caring person and I wish her all the best.
I think the ‘tough love’ approach and pushing her through isn’t necessarily going to work in her fragile state. X just my experience of having a small insight into dealing with anxiety, no where near the scale that you have to deal with. X