Where do I move forward from here, and what options do I have?

[caj]

You've had some great advice above. The only additional thought I would add is to email her all that you have suggested / agreed etc with her. Kind of minutes. This gives you a record that you can go back to in the future if you need to.

[MK_club1987]

Originally Posted by Fairysparkled

This will be hard for you to take .She is treating you like a lapdog and you are letting her. Does she take your son when she goes out every night. You will need to grow a pair before this gets easier for you. It sounds as if this relationship has not been good for sometime. You know better than anyone what needs done.

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Oh don't worry about being harsh, I know what your saying is true.

Thank you everyone for your replies.

[Stitchesmumanddad]

If she claims Universal Credit, if you pay her payments over and above CMS - that “maintain her” these are deducted from Universal credit £ for £ so such payments are of no value to her. Its a trap many fall into.

[Fairysparkled]

If you end up giving her cash, get a receipt. So when benefits chase you later on, and they will. You have got proof of payments.

[ERICSMUM]

She or you can work out how much benefit support she can claim for, housing benefit etc plus your child maintenance. That is then her budget for finding somewhere she can afford to live. My niece had to do this when her little boy was still a baby. The flat wasn’t perfect but she managed fine.

You aren’t obliged to pay two lots of rent.

[iloveholidays1]

Please don't let this drag on. My nephew was in a similar position with 2 children, it dragged on for over 3 years. He was left paying for everything and all the debts too. His life was miserable and it affected the children as well. It wasn't until he met someone new and he eventually moved in with her (it needed someone close to him to put a stop to it). The change in him is amazing and wonderful to see.

What' happening with the ex haven't got a clue and after what she did I'm not interested at all. It was so toxic and the family really worried for his mental health. He was a nice easy going guy and she took full advantage.

[MK_club1987]

Just wanna say a quick thank you to everyone who's replied with their advice, it's much appreciated.

[THE WIZARD]

Originally Posted by MK_club1987

Just wanna say a quick thank you to everyone who's replied with their advice, it's much appreciated.

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Now make sure you sit down, digest it, then use it to advantage. Otherwise you will have a long time regretting it!