To cancel or not to cancel ?

[mushumadness]

My parents paid half of my wedding and my husbands parents paid the other half
My husbands one of two boys
I think the norm now is to contribute to say reception cake etc

[OrlandoNick]

Personally I think you should concentrate on paying your holiday and not leaving yourself broke. You mention in your post ‘we’re fully booked for next October and the savings are going well’ so I assume that you’re not the only one going on holiday and you’ve got your budget well thought out. If you do leave yourself tight because of helping your son and his wedding costs it affects the other members of your group who are also going on the holiday. It sounds like this holiday has not come easily for you so please go and enjoy the holiday.
Most couples do not assume their parents will pay or contribute large sums for a wedding. I understand where you are coming from in that you’d like to contribute so I would suggest you pay for the cake or something of similar value. Enjoy the holiday and the wedding day - it sounds like you’re a caring dad that you’re thinking of all this. Certainly do not think of spending a few grand on the wedding though, it’s too much money for an event that takes place on one day.

[peewakio]

I've had a conversation with my son and talked about budgets and so on. It's not an extravagant affair at all in fact there isn't a wedding breakfast. It's on a Friday so they've got the reception venue quite reasonably cheap which includes buffet and disco @ £1200
So I've told him that I'll pay that which he's over the moon about and it looks as though we won't have to think about cancelling now... Happy days

[Toria_dee]

Originally Posted by peewakio

I've had a conversation with my son and talked about budgets and so on. It's not an extravagant affair at all in fact there isn't a wedding breakfast. It's on a Friday so they've got the reception venue quite reasonably cheap which includes buffet and disco @ £1200
So I've told him that I'll pay that which he's over the moon about and it looks as though we won't have to think about cancelling now... Happy days

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Glad it's all worked out for you and your son!

xx

[Beth_Disney]

That's a good outcome and I'm sure your son and his partner are more than happy with that.
I was just about to post that my in laws paid for the flowers and gave us £1000 towards our honeymoon spends. We didn't ask for anything from either set of parents and specifically chose our wedding venue, hotel, dress, cars etc. within our budget. We didn't expect anything and it looks like your son has done something pretty similar.

[Tinkerbell]

My daughter and SIL paid for their own wedding apart from


I bought my daughters dress
Husband gave them a fixed sum towards costs

[Scaramouche]

Neither my parents of DFs Dad have discussed them helping towards the wedding. We know they want to help, but we haven’t discussed figures other than us saying “we are doing this within our budget. If you want to help that’s great. But we’re not relying on it”.

We wouldn’t be comfortable having the wedding we are having if others were paying for it. By all means if they want to help that would be lovely, but if not, we’ve got it covered.

Enjoy your holiday!

[hideinpockets]

We are really lucky as both my parents and my OH’s parents are giving us a fair amount of money for our wedding. However we did not expect this and in fact were completely surprised when they offered, they’ve both said they want to pay towards the wedding and want to help out. But if they couldn’t or didn’t offer we certainly wouldn’t expect it so if you do want to pay towards the wedding just do whatever you can afford.