DH's revised job application - brilliant!

[DisneyBlonde]

My DH is looking for work and becoming a little despondent that he is not hearing anything back and the same jobs are advertised.

He thought he should change his application text and asked me to proof-read this

Dear Sir/Madam/Robot/Back-End-Server,

I am writing in response to the job advertised in the full knowledge that you are probably not human and that this application will only initiate (as a result of now having access to this email address) a never ending stream of spam emails asking me how I would like to improve the size of my business and launch a series of phone calls from Outer Mongolia enquiring as to my internet health (because every job I have applied for thus far, and there have been many, have caused this type of mental trauma).

I would normally include a covering letter that goes something like this:

(Normal letter)

But, as no-one will read this, because you are a machine, I won't bother.

I look forward to a deluge of unsolicited phone calls and emails upon dispatch of this email.

If you are human (hah!) then please by all means move this mail to the trash (as by now I will have ruined any chance of potential employment).

If you are indeed an articial intelligence, then, here's a joke for you:

01001101 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100111 00100000 01110101 01110011 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100011 01101000 01100001 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110000 01100101 01101111 01110000 01101100 01100101 00100000 01101111 01101110 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110100 00101110 00100000 01001001 01110100 00100000 01100111 01101111 01110100 00100000 01110011 01101111 00100000 01100010 01100001 01100100 00101100 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01001001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01100001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01100001 01110111 01100001 01111001 00101110

Also, if you are Klingon, here is a joke for you:

Ha'DIbaH DanoHmeH nuv mech Duj'e' bike lot. 'oH Suq qab yItlhobneSQo', tagha' bike nge' vIghaj.

I have 2 cats.

Yours blah blah,

DH (human)."

[Pumpkin Pie]

Hah - it will be interesting to hear what responses he gets.

Joking aside one of my sons went through this when he left university. I hope your husband gets a job offer soon.

[DisneyBlonde]

Thank you.

It’s difficult as he has passed exams in the industry but has no experience so it’s going to be a long road I think.

It wou,d be funny if he got a response in 1100110

[pumpkin mom]

Absolutely brilliant. Love it especial the I have two cats bit. Hope he gets good news on the job front soon. X

[JessBlu]

Unpaid voluntary work in the field may help him.

I would reply to a application like that !

Well done

[tocpe321]

Loved the binary joke especially the pun when 00010 was swapped for 01000.

Genius.

[Pumpkin Pie]

Originally Posted by JessBlu

Unpaid voluntary work in the field may help him.

I would reply to a application like that !

Well done

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My son wrote to a couple of charities to get experience - his letters were never acknowledged.

[JessBlu]

Originally Posted by Pumpkin Pie

My son wrote to a couple of charities to get experience - his letters were never acknowledged.

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Keep going, I wrote 100’s before I got my break.

[Pumpkin Pie]

Originally Posted by JessBlu

Keep going, I wrote 100’s before I got my break.

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Sorry I didn't explain this was a few years ago. He did eventually get a job and is happy with his lot now!