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Old 12 Oct 19, 06:57 PM  
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Dinglebert
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Crematorium Letter

My mother passed away last month. Her ceremony was held at the local crematorium.

Today I received a letter from their head office offering amongst other things a rememberance plaque somewhere around the crematorium also her ashes to be made into jewellery.

I make no comment about people who choose to do such things at all. Different people need different things to get them through and have their memories.

However what I am seething at is getting the letter in the first place. I did not give them permission to contact me. I feel I have receive a spam mailing from a crematorium trying to upsell me. They have used my details to try to sell me things. I imagine they do that with every next of kin identified. I just feel its plain wrong. I had to give them my demographic details to go ahead with the funeral. I feel they have no right to use that to then try to upsell their services at a later time.

The law changed last year with the new Data Protection Act based on GDPR. Nowadays its not a case of you have to opt out of this type of contact instead you have to opt in. Without opt in they have no right to send me junk mail. If there needed to be contact due to say collecting the ashes then that would be different but it isn't the case. The ashes were collected from the Funeral Director already.

I detest junk mail with a vengance at the best of times but this just really gets to me. In many respects they are playing on emotions. You are not doing the best for your deceased relative unless you buy this extra thing etc.

I have sent them an email which explains just how much I don't appreciate their letter and brochures and that I will be taking my concerns to the ICO. It may be an over the top reaction but their actions anger me.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 09:09 AM  
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RachaelC
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I’m not surprised you’re angry. They shouldn’t be marketing to you without express consent and it seems that their timing is questionable too!

I hope you get an apologetic response from them.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 09:26 AM  
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Tinkerbell 1
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Firstly I am sorry to hear of your loss.

It may be that the crematorium thought it appropriate to contact you under the legitimate interest clause. I’m sure they didn’t mean to upset you.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 09:31 AM  
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ERICSMUM
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Blimey, that’s very insensitive and disrespectful, not to mention the infringement of DP.

I wonder if your “consent” was hidden in paperwork etc that you had to sign - in the main doc rather than the usual tick box ?

They should know how people react in the weeks after the funeral - often the time when bereavement really “hits”. Before a funeral we are busy making arrangements, letting people know etc, then the day after - reality kicks in.

I would be pursuing them too, but don’t let it upset you too much. If you feel able to, perhaps you could update us ?

Take care

Linda xx
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Old 13 Oct 19, 10:02 AM  
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Sorry for your loss.
I know exactly what you mean I lost my darling dad four months ago and after his burial the coop sent me a survey to see what I thought of the service! I thought that was really insensitive and got thrown in the bin x
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Old 13 Oct 19, 10:08 AM  
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FlorayG
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Absolutely agree with you. I never had this after my mom was cremated I would also have been furious to receive marketing like this
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Old 13 Oct 19, 10:40 AM  
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Dinglebert
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Many thanks for the replies. I'm not upset as in hurt or feeling sorrow. I'm upset as in angry that they feel that what they have done is apporpriate or indeed legal.

I would like an explanation as to why they felt they had a legal right to send me the mail. If they have hidden a clause in the documents signed then I would like them to reflect on that practice. Consent has to be implicit and easy to understand. It cannot be implied. You can no longer have boxes which you need to tick to not be contacted. It must now be the other way round.

Unfortunately for them since retiring as a nurse I now work in the Information Governance department of our health board. My day to day work is all around compliance with the Data Protection Act.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 10:59 AM  
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Firstly, I'm really sorry for your loss.

I think the mailing is completely inappropriate too.

I know it is not the same but when we had our cat put to sleep, the vet offered us some pamphlets to take away and look at when we felt ready, to see if this was something we wanted. It seems to me the crem could have done the same for you, ie offered some pamphlets when you contacted them, and if you said no, left it at that.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 11:13 AM  
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macadoo
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My dad passed away in July and I received a similar mailing from the crematorium with details for what we can do with the ashes, plaques etc.

Have to say I wasn’t offended in the slightest. We already have a plot and my dad will go with my mom, but if we hadn’t then I might have appreciated knowing what our options are.

Sorry for your loss op.

Edited at 11:14 AM.
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Old 13 Oct 19, 11:58 AM  
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I think you can look at this in another way. Perhaps at the time of the cremation you may not have wanted to think of commemorating in this way. A few weeks on then perhaps that’s the time to do it. We got the same when my mum died, although I think it was sent from the funeral directors.
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