sorry in advance

[animal 1970]

after 22 years of marriage and 27 years of being together i found out my husband has been texting another woman that he was with over 30 years ago.they gave been in contact for 14 years thats when i caught him the first time and he promised me it was all done but yesterday he left his old phone on the table while he was messenger on his new one i could see it all telling her how much he loves her when i confronted him he just said he cannot be without her and has been like it for 6 months he hasnt seen her for 30 years but he has left me and my girls for her who has not even left her husband and is going away with him and there girls in 3 weeks i feel like i am in a dream

[Sue]

I didn’t want to read and not comment. So sorry for your pain, I hope that you have someone to talk to and offer support at this time.

[louiseybobs]

I'm so sorry to read this, sending all my love. Xx

[Guest]

I'm so sorry x

[Jedi Princess]

I’m so sorry to read your post. I hope you’ve got friend/family to support you. Sending you a virtual hug Xxx

[Twin mummy]

So sorry you are having to go through this, no wonder you feel as though you are in a dream.

This might seem harsh but my advice would be to make sure you secure your finances asap, especially any joint accounts and joint savings. I have heard so many times from friends and others how important this is. I know you are reeling but he might be mentally ahead of you as he has thought about leaving and therefore might move quickly. x

[maidmarian]

Oh hell, I feel for you ☹️😭
Get your house in order is my advice, don't hang around, he deserves nothing! Xx

[animal 1970]

thanks for your replys i have locked the joint accounts but before he even said sorry he said i have to buy him out with £40000 or sell the house i am 50 years old i cannot get hold of £40000 just like that and i dont want to sell i have put alot into this house and i would be mortgage free in 3.5 years i am ticked off as he watched me book holidays and buy my camper van all the time hes been in touch with her i have also bee told he cannot sell from under me while my dd is still in education

[DisneyDaffodil]

I am so sorry, you must feel devastated. I hope you and your girls will be comfort for each other to get through this.

As TwinMummy says above, please lookout for your finances. Secure your wages and open an account in your name only and get your wages and child benefit paid into this. Also, make sure you know what will happen to your home and savings, and make sure the bills have been getting paid and your DH hasn’t built up any debts in your joint names. This sounds scary and extreme, but I’m a CAB advisor and see so many people in your position and all too often, their DH has been funding his other partner/family out of their joint income and they discover debts they didn’t know they had 😔

There’s a lot of info that may help in the link below

citizensadvice.uk/fa...-relationship/

Again I’m so sorry xx

Edited to add There’s a lot of info on the house/mortgage issues on the link too, but if the house is in joint names, you have as much rights as he does. You will need to see a solicitor, many give a free 30 minute session, ring some to see if this is available and make a list of the most important things you want addressed as they will charge you after the free period. Good luck 💕

[Colette-S]

So sorry. Don’t do anything rash and don’t make any offers or discuss finance until you get some good legal advice. A good solicitor will give you some basic advice to start and then some time to think things over.
Take care x