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Old 22 Dec 19, 04:27 PM  
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dubletrub
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Not read all the replies but before I even got to the end of your post I thought you are being catfished.
If you have never watched the programme then watch it, you really never know who you are talking to over the Internet 😕
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Old 22 Dec 19, 05:00 PM  
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swiper
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I think you should just close the door on this one. Don’t waist anymore brain time on this, move on and find the right person for you... he might be just around the corner.
Good luck with your search, some people have had great experiences using dating sites!
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Old 22 Dec 19, 05:35 PM  
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THE WIZARD
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Originally Posted by duchy View Post
There is a more sinister explanation that occurred to me in the light of the offering to pick you up scenario, then claiming a situation where it would be easier to steer the scenario into a meeting at yours rather than in public ... maybe I have a nasty mind ... or maybe you dodged a bullet !
Try not to dwell on the what ifs ... no one really knows and his behaviour was at best odd xx
Sorry but I am with duchy on this one! I didnt like that he wanted to know what you had been wearing for a start, that (I am told) is usually the soft opening to what are you wearing now etc... Also in one post above you wrote
'I did only get limited pics of him despite him asking me for new ones all the time...' did you give him plenty of pictures? Are those pictures out there now in cyber land and could be used as identity pictures for another fake contact? sorry dont want to alarm you but please be careful who you send pictures to - you have no idea the pictures you have seen of him are actually him at all do you.
Chalk this up to experience, none of it is your fault, look how many women have on-line relationships for 6 months to a year before the inevitable 'could you loan me some money etc' its cruel & wicked but you have been bitten possibly once and now you will be wiser.
You sound a lovely person and there is someone nice out there waiting to meet you, dont be sad this had happened be glad as it will make you more savvy the next time & better able to handle any upcoming situations.
I've never done so but the speed dating thing always looked good to me - many of us know in an instant and short chat whats kosher and whats not when your face to face with someone.
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Old 22 Dec 19, 07:23 PM  
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Macca04
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You’ve had some great advice on here, that’s what I love about this site, people getting behind you and giving you support and love.

Best wishes to you for Christmas forget this loser, there is someone wonderful out there for you.
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Old 22 Dec 19, 07:52 PM  
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MK_club1987
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It's difficult for anyone to know exactly what was going on with this person, however it does sound very much like a catfish, or maybe I've just watched far too much of MTV's Catfish!

Either way I hope you have a lovely Christmas, and I'm sure your soulmate is out there somewhere, and you'll find him soon enough!
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Old 22 Dec 19, 08:10 PM  
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marypoppins38
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Originally Posted by duchy View Post
There is a more sinister explanation that occurred to me in the light of the offering to pick you up scenario, then claiming a situation where it would be easier to steer the scenario into a meeting at yours rather than in public ... maybe I have a nasty mind ... or maybe you dodged a bullet !
Try not to dwell on the what ifs ... no one really knows and his behaviour was at best odd xx
I agree with Duchy here, from the outside what I read really worries me. He is playing on your sympathies and emotions and the fact that you are a nice person. I think you have had a lucky escape. He may well have not been sinister but in this day and age you can't be too careful. Take care x
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Old 22 Dec 19, 08:34 PM  
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Jakey Neverland
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Agree with a majority, I wouldn't go near him if he pops back up at all. It screams a married man who potentially has a wife that found his account.
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Old 22 Dec 19, 09:21 PM  
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act1980
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Originally Posted by Pink_Fairy_Dust View Post
POF deletes accounts for all sorts of reasons, say certain words get mentioned or you are swopping too many pics on there, copying and pasting messages or if a few users block you in a row (people do block people just for messaging them and they don' like pics)

I tried looking on a few School pages in the town he worked but there are about 3 or 4 schools I can't find staff list for in the area... I did only get limited pics of him despite him asking me for new ones all the time... and I agree the number thing is bizarre as most guys want to move the conversation off the site the first opportunity they get...

I just find it weird as he had offered me a lift to start with so can't have been in this from the start to just humiliate someone by standing them up at a venue and not turning up... plus why waste the 6 hours last night talking to me and constantly asking I haven't put you off have I and talking about the future and pointing out to me everything we have in common...

If he deleted his own account I just really feel like I must have done something... and don't married guys just want to chat naughty etc and not take it offline through fear of getting caught, he talked at length about his house and living alone and if we started dating watching movies in front of fire etc... he was keen from very early on to meet and date and take things slow, he talked about meeting up so much actually, he was constantly going on about how excited he was for Saturday... I mean if it was just for the flirtation he didn't even really try and talk about sex much as so many try and do on those sites...

He did mention whenever he had pic public getting some messages from pupils parents and that he didn't want that so wondering if either one of them has reported him as revenge for not talking to them or he deleted his account not liking the attention from them...

Plus he used a username that was very close to his surname with the year of his birth so not one that someone hiding would use and he talked about hating cheating as that was what lead to his last breakup and he told me that before I told him my breakup story...

I felt rubbish after got stood up but instantly calmed down when heard details of him getting attacked and was so reassured by all messages last night he was genuine only to be shot down again...
Could it be that he offered you a lift so that he could find out where you live. And you say his name was a common one, perhaps not his real name then? Something doesn't add up to me but I would try not to waste anymore time thinking about him, I think you've probably had a lucky escape.
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Old 22 Dec 19, 09:40 PM  
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jas72
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Move on annoying to have had your time wasted though.

The whole I got mugged story sounds fake as well.
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Old 22 Dec 19, 10:05 PM  
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It stinks. I know you so wanted it to work out but it's all way to complicated to be genuine. A lucky escape I think. Put it behind you now and who knows what the new year will bring.
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