Need some support and kind words

[lindyT]

I so feel for you. Having heath problems with your children,even at your sons age,is so difficult to deal with. We want to take charge,and they want the same. Please forgive me if this has already been explored but you mention a DN. Is that a Diabetes Nurse? Can you make an appointment with a Consultant,and maybe discuss another route to the one the DN has indicated to your son? Occasionally there can be other medical avenues to explore,which may suit him better.I hope things improve for you both, best wishes, Linda, x

[soooexcited!]

No great words of advice I'm afraid. It's sounds like you've all been to hell and back. I've come across a few young men in my work who have really struggled to come to terms with a diabetes diagnosis. Does he get on well with anyone from the diabetes specialist nursing teams? I work with a fantastic nurse who is brilliant at supporting people with diabetes. She has a lovely approach. Or do they offer peer support. Some of the people I've come across gain a lot of support understanding and insight from others in the same situation. The hardest part is knowing he has to be the one to engage and make changes. Look after yourself and keep talking x

[Princess Ariel]

Originally Posted by lindyT

I so feel for you. Having heath problems with your children,even at your sons age,is so difficult to deal with. We want to take charge,and they want the same. Please forgive me if this has already been explored but you mention a DN. Is that a Diabetes Nurse? Can you make an appointment with a Consultant,and maybe discuss another route to the one the DN has indicated to your son? Occasionally there can be other medical avenues to explore,which may suit him better.I hope things improve for you both, best wishes, Linda, x

See more...

Sorry yes it’s diabetic nurse, I’ve spoken to his consultant before and they really are trying everything they can to support him, they’ve even stopped his short acting insulin (he should have this before meals) so he is only taking his long acting twice a day to try and make it easier for him. They even managed to sort a trial for the new blood sugar monitoring scanner. His psychiatric consultant was amazing and even went to his diabetic appointments with him to try and understand and work with them too. I met with her in the summer and she basically said she doesn’t know what more anyone else can do for DS and he is playing a very dangerous game. Very shortly after this he disengaged with them completely.
I’m honestly at a loss which is what makes this whole situation so frustrating and difficult.

[Princess Ariel]

Originally Posted by soooexcited!

No great words of advice I'm afraid. It's sounds like you've all been to hell and back. I've come across a few young men in my work who have really struggled to come to terms with a diabetes diagnosis. Does he get on well with anyone from the diabetes specialist nursing teams? I work with a fantastic nurse who is brilliant at supporting people with diabetes. She has a lovely approach. Or do they offer peer support. Some of the people I've come across gain a lot of support understanding and insight from others in the same situation. The hardest part is knowing he has to be the one to engage and make changes. Look after yourself and keep talking x

See more...

Our local university has a diabetic sports team and I’ve tried to encourage him to get involved with this a few times but although he says to me he’ll look into it he never has. It’s like he’s still in total denial about it all.

[Irishlass]

I was also going to suggest the pump, but tbh if he wont even keep on track with his blood sugars then they won't even consider him for the pump.

I know there's a new type of patch out now, where you scan over it with your phone to get your blood reading but its still in trial stage atm as far as I'm aware, and again, you need to show and prove that you can be responsible enough to so the relevant checks to even be thought of to get one.
Both the pump and the patch thing also require the relevant training programmes before even having them fitted.

I wish I could offer you some words of comfort of wisdom but really its down to your son to take his condition seriously. You can say everything till you're blue in the face but its ultimately down to him unfortunately.
I hope you and your son can find the relevant help, advice and guidance very soon and that you can both start to deal with these and getvl some sort of normality back.

Thinking of you both and sending my best wishes

[buryboy]

First of all Ariel well done for opening up on here.
That’s the first thing for your own mental health.
You have friends on here ; there are always more people going through life events than anyone would wish for.
I was hoping you would open up having read a recent post of yours on another thread where it appeared you were getting to the far end.

Does he have any medical staff or people at the YMCA he really trusts ?

I think finding that person who he can relate to could be the catalyst to a change in outlook.
Or any people he could meet who have been through the bad times and are now managing better that might inspire him ?
Maybe try and see if you can change any of his medical team that he has no faith in ?

As for you , just try to keep calm. I am sure you will have tried everything you can to help him see the light.

Best of luck x

[soooexcited!]

Originally Posted by Princess Ariel

Our local university has a diabetic sports team and I’ve tried to encourage him to get involved with this a few times but although he says to me he’ll look into it he never has. It’s like he’s still in total denial about it all.

See more...

It sounds like you've been an amazing supportive Mum. It may sound hard but maybe he needs to talk to people who have suffered the consequences of not looking after their diabetes. There's some fantastic patients who are often willing to offer support and share their stories warts & all to try and encourage others into taking control.

[3disneykids]

Wow sounds such a difficult situation.
I understand that it is distressing for him to have been diagnosed with this but he is now and adult and needs to take some responsibility.
I am shocked though how the mental health team have discharged him because surely this is a red flag that he is deteriorating.
Is there any chance the younger ones could spend a few weeks with a relative so that maybe you could bring him home and try to settle him and see if you could make things work better at home.

I really hope that you manage to get through to him. Sending hugs xx

[TheHughesCrew]

I'm utterly frustrated, on your behalf. I can't even begin to imagine the turmoil in your sons mind, and the impact it has on you and your family. Here's hoping that one day he sees sense. Lots of love x

[Mallky555]

Hi I’m so sorry for what you are going through😢
I work on a MH acute male ward and we actually have a patient that was ready for discharged and his discharge blood work showed up he was diabetic this was so out of control nobody could actually believe he was still alive anyway long story short this was 6 months ago this patient accepts all diabetic medications bloods etc from us nurses but refuses to accept he is diabetic so remains an inpatient
What I’m trying to say is I think rather than short stints in hospitals your son needs a thorough assessment of what’s the route cause of this behaviour clearly any other inpatient MH stays have not been sufficient to get to why he isn’t looking after himself. This is a form of deliberate self harm if he’s missing medications as he appears to understand the consequences of he doesn’t take then but perhaps the depression is over riding this! Personally if this happens again I would be rocking up at my local accident and emergency and requesting to see the mental health liaison team 😘 I haven’t read all the replies and I’m sorry if this has been done but it’s important that you advocate for your son if he ends up back in hospital you need to meet with his consultants and continue to reiterate what’s gone wrong before any patterns to behaviour you are aware of etc unfortunately we see it al the time where patients can mask symptoms it’s easy over 2/3 weeks cos usually 18 patients 2 nurses if we r lucky longer inpatient stays are in complex cases so much more telling as people can’t mask for that long eventually something gives.
However you also have to look after yourself and your other children as no doubt this is all having an adverse effect on them and obviously you 😘